Yesterday
by Mini Luv
Summary: Have you ever known something you shouldn't? Have you ever loved someone without knowing why? Maybe there's a reason.
1. The Beginning

Harry wasn't feeling very well. In fact, he was feeling quite horrible. It might have had something to do with the fact that everyone he loved seemed to be dying, but Harry was quite sure it had more to do with the six pieces of pie he ate for dessert. Why, you may ask, had he eaten so many pieces of pie? Well, you see, Ron had told him that there was no way he could eat that many pieces of pie, and Harry, being Harry, couldn't turn down such a dare. So, there he was, groaning in pain and making his way through the corridors, trying to somehow make it to the dorm without dying. It was then that he was interrupted by an upheaval of activity, quite literally actually.

Oh god, there he was. Moaning like an idiot and stumbling through the corridors. Draco sneered, very sure he really didn't want to see said person at that moment. It wasn't just because he hated him; it was also because of the noises Harry was making, because really, when someone is making noises quite like that, sometimes it's just better not to know.

"Jeez, Potter, I didn't realize you were pregnant." Draco had come to stand near Harry, and it was at that exact moment that Harry's stomach decided to rid itself of its contents, all over Draco.

There is rarely a time in ones life when one is able to tell one's enemy that their face makes you want to throw up and actually mean it; this was one of those times. Draco, who had an amazingly witty sense of humour, found the situation quite humorous. He suppressed his laughter though, because laughing at someone in such a sorry state, even one's enemy, was just plain rude, and rude, Draco was not. Narcissistic, unmerciful and plain cruel he may be, but never rude.

The sorry state that Harry was in was crumpled up on the floor beside his own barf, completely passed out. Draco had never seen a more sad sight. In fact, it was so sad, he actually felt himself feeling the slightest bit of pity for Harry, just a little though, because most of what he was feeling was amusement. Anyone would have to admit that someone stupid enough to eat that much pie pretty much deserved whatever they got. His amusement, however, passed when he noticed that he had quite a predicament. He could take Harry somewhere more suitable, such as to Madam Pomfrey, or he could leave him. After a quick moment of thought, Draco yawned deeply, stretching his arms upwards in a fit of weariness. Stepping over Harry, Draco headed toward his dorm.

About five steps later he paused and turned back to glance at the unmoving body. Everyone was still eating supper, as Harry had left right after eating dessert (which he ate before anything else). As such, it would only be a little while before Harry's friends poured out ready to peel him off the floor and take him to their dorm. Mind you, at the same time his friends came out of the Great Hall, so would the rest of the entire student body, which, on a whole, was a lot of people. Now as much as Draco greatly disliked Harry, maybe even hated him, he did not wish him to be smothered and trampled to death. That itself was a little bit of a daunting way to die, and he definitely didn't want that on his conscience. If he wanted to do something dreadfully sneaky and devious he could just kill Harry now while he was unconscious, but the whole leaving him to be trampled to death was a little much.

Mind you, it would be nice to not have to listen to the prat…Draco mentally slapped himself. There was nothing evil in killing someone accidentally. Would the Dark Lord be impressed when he found out that Draco had left Harry to die? No, he would not. He would, however, be impressed when Draco pulled off a particularly clever plan involving deviously thought out actions and manipulative stabbing in the back. And with that thought, Draco let out a huge sigh and began to scoop Harry into his arms. Well, he sort of just picked up Harry's arms, and pretty much just dragged him to the hospital wing, but saying he scooped him up into his arms sounded so much more….manly.

He soon found the hospital wing empty of anyone and sighed yet again. He dragged Harry right beside a bed. Biting his lip, he looked down upon the heap of limbs and almost wished he'd left Harry to die for the sole reason that actually getting him onto the bed would be unnecessarily hard. Draco scrunched up his nose at that thought. That definitely sounded very wrong. After a moment of thought he bent down and grabbed Harry's arms again and pulled him up into an almost standing position with Harry leaning against him. Draco put his arms around Harry's waist and sort of flopped him onto the bed. He shifted around a bit and soon found himself and Harry situated horizontally on the bed.

Draco had every intention of getting off of Harry. However, now that he was lying on top of Harry, and his legs had somehow managed to get in between Harry's, he found that he felt oh so suddenly sleepy. Harry was, after all, surprisingly soft, and very comfortable. Even so, Draco still had every intention of getting off of Harry, but, at the exact moment he began to get off of him, he passed out. His head landed slowly and comfortably on Harry's chest and the boys lay there, for all the world looking like they'd done it a million times. Which, of course, they had, even if they hadn't known it at the time.


	2. Thinking

It wasn't in anyway intended to be mean. It was meant to be a harmless, innocent prank to teach Harry a lesson and allow his friends to laugh momentarily at him. It wouldn't be harsh laugh, merely a friendly teasing laugh. If only it had turned out that way.

The potion gives whoever drinks it a horrendous stomach ache right before they fall into a deep, deep sleep. Of course, the effect on your stomach comes from inside, but you can still fall asleep from the fumes. It's quite needless to say, but if Draco had had any clue to the fact that Harry's pie had contained this potion he would have plugged his nose and run away without a second glance. The sad truth was that Harry's friends arrived to scrape him off the floor seconds after Draco turned the corner on his way to the hospital wing.

Draco sighed contentedly. He felt warm and lazy, a soft bed beneath him that seemed as if it were made for him, moulded and formed to fit his body perfectly. Draco moved his head slightly, brushing it gently across what was beneath him. It seemed to breathe with him, an exhale greeted with another, a moving beneath his head for every single breath taken. It was this that startled him- after all, beds don't breathe.

Confused, he opened his eyes. There, standing at the door of the hospital wing, stood Ron Weasley, his eyes wide and his face as white as a ghost's. 

"Weasley?" he whispered as he lifted his head. 

Dumbledore looked up from his desk and surveyed Minerva. "Whatever is the matter?" he asked pleasantly as he popped a lemon drop in his mouth. She wrung her hands nervously and frowned. 

"I have a bad feeling; it's as if something very wrong is going on." Her frown deepened and Dumbledore replied with a thoughtful "hmmm" and tapped his lip. This went on for about three seconds before an earsplitting scream perforated the quiet of the school. Jumping a great three feet in the air, Minerva's eyes became the size of bowling balls as she landed awkwardly on her chair, her hair for once untidy and frizzed.

"Well," Dumbledore said pleasantly not seeming to see her changed appearance. "I'd say that says it all."

Draco winced and recoiled closer to the warmth beneath him. With an intake of breath that signalled how shocked he was at his own actions, he looked down and had an even larger intake of breath. Beneath him was the sleeping form of Harry Potter. His eyes felt like they'd fall out as he contemplated the gravity of the situation. Yes, he was lying on Potter, on a bed, but, that didn't mean anything…had… happened, now did it? Well, yes, unfortunately it usually did.

"Listen, Weasley, it's not what it looks like." He raised his hands to help try and explain himself, which, as he soon found, was a very bad idea. Without the support of his hands he fell forward and his face landed so close to Harry's that they were touching, or rather their lips were touching.

Draco felt his face flush as red as Ron's hair. Now, he was not only caught lying on Harry, on a bed, but, he was caught kissing Harry, lying on top of him, on a bed. Oh, boy. Paralyzed with shock, Draco just stayed like that for a moment not really able to move just yet. Then, as if it couldn't get worse, Harry opened his eyes.

At first they were half closed, dreamy and sleepy, then they grew large with shock. Draco's face erupted into an even brighter scarlet colour. From somewhere behind him, Ron made a strangled noise. Draco knew that this would probably have been a very good time to move, but he was still rooted to the spot, and obviously, so was Harry.

"Oh my goodness!" Professor McGonagall paled and seemed to sway. At the sight of Professor McGonagall swaying, Draco suddenly regained control of his body and raised his head from Potter's face. Harry still seemed shocked and dazed, and was staring up at Draco with a scared expression.

"It's not what it looks like," Draco said defensively.

"Indeed, dear boy, then what is it?" Dumbledore's eyes twinkled as he looked on with an amused yet happy expression.

"Yes indeed." Professor Snape walked into the room and immediately crossed his arms, a frown deeply etched across his face, the lines across his forehead more prominent. "I heard screaming and I do hope someone was in intense pain, otherwise they will regret dragging me away from my books- and may soon find themselves experiencing intense pain."

Ron let out a whimper as he stared at his friend, and the boy lying on top of him. Draco had before been thinking about jumping off of a bridge, but now he was thinking about pushing Snape off of a bridge, and possibly throwing Weasley off as well. The thought almost caused him to laugh, but wisely he decided this wasn't the time for it.

"Now, now, Severus, no need to get explicit, I'm sure they have a perfectly acceptable explanation for the situation." Draco breathed a sigh of relief. Dumbledore deserved all the lollipops in the world.

"You see, I was walking through the halls completely minding my own business when this  
idiot-."

"Hey!" Apparently, being insulted was the only thing that would wake Harry out of his delirium.

"As I was saying, this 'thing'," Draco glared down at Harry, as though blaming him for all of his problems, "was moaning and groaning through the hallways." Harry glared back and Severus raised an eyebrow. "Exactly what I thought" he said, giving Snape a knowing glance. "Anyways, I saw him, then he puked all over my shoes, which, I may add, was a disgusting and completely-"

"Oh, get on with it!" Harry exclaimed, obviously annoyed.

"Then I was scared he would get trampled to death so I dragged him here and passed out on top of him." Draco smirked, convinced he had cleared his name of any implications the situation might have.

"I have one question," Snape droned on in a bored tone.

Draco quirked his brow. "What?" 

"Why are you still lying on him?" A silence fell over the room as Draco's cheeks flared, yet again, as did Harry's. He looked down at the other boy then quickly scrambled off of him. 

Dumbledore smiled as though enjoying a particularly good sweet and Draco happily contemplated feeding him to the giant squid. Snape scoffed at Draco's hurried scrambling and once again dampened Draco's chances of explaining the situation. "So, you're saying you simply passed out?"

"Well…" Draco thought for an explanation but couldn't find one. "Yes."

"Professor! Professor!" Hermione fell into the room panting.

"Oh goody, more people." Snape grimaced. Hermione clutched her side for a moment while she took in the scene. Her eyes grew wide. "Oh dear…" she said.

He should have known. Draco folded his arms and frowned, raising an eyebrow. "Oh dear is right." 

"Miss Granger, you wouldn't happen to have anything to do with this, would you?" Dumbledore looked down at her expectantly. Hermione looked down at the floor guiltily and winced.

"I'm so sorry, Professor, I didn't know it would turn out like this, I really didn't." Her head hung sheepishly and she looked defeated, as though she were disgusted with herself. Draco felt his heart melt a little. She may be a Mudblood, and he could never, ever like her, but right at that moment, he felt a little bad for her. If there was anyone who knew what guilt felt like it was him and he could imagine what she was going through. Not that she was anywhere near being comparable to him.

"It was just a simple potion that would make Harry fall asleep; it was a stupid prank."

Dumbledore nodded knowingly. "Alright then, that settles it; I suppose there's nothing else really to see here."

Snape seemed shocked at that answer and spun towards Dumbledore. "Surely Ms. Granger should get a detention for this, it certainly inconvenienced Mr. Malfoy." Snape stared menacingly at Hermione, intent on making her feel his wrath.

"Come now, Severus, surely you did those things when you were a boy? It was a harmless prank and Mr. Malfoy being involved was purely an accident. In fact," he beamed at Draco, like an executioner beams at his prisoner, "I think Draco deserves points for his saving of Harry; he showed kindness in his thinking of others. Two hundred points for Slytherin." And with that, he turned and walked slowly from the room, his footsteps echoing with sickening thuds off of the encircling walls. McGonagall had at some point regained her composure and now seemed to think nothing more of the situation than some students getting into trouble; she didn't even seem to comprehend that something more could be going on. She turned and followed Dumbledore with her usual grace and air. Snape gave them all a last grim glance, stopping to glare especially at Draco, a message seeming to pass between the two. He turned and stalked off to his dungeons to do who knows what- probably tear apart some poor first year's Potions paper.

Draco's knuckles were white, his hands shaking from gripping them so hard. Two hundred points for saving Harry Potter, his sworn enemy. Two hundred points for working against the Dark Lord, his soon to be master, two hundred points. The words kept slithering through his head like vicious snakes, snapping at him every chance they got.

He heard a chuckle behind him. He turned around to see Harry sitting on the bed, his feet swaying over the edge and a huge smile plastered on his face. "That was certainly something wasn't it?" he said to Draco. He said it directly to Draco. Not to Hermione, to Draco.

"Yeah." With that he turned slightly again and clenched his teeth as Hermione smiled a sweet smile of relief. "I'm really sorry, Draco-"

"Shut up," he said on the edge of losing it, of exploding, his emotions fiery and uncontrollable, his whole body tense, muscles clenched. "Just shut up." He breathed quickly through his nose. He looked right at Harry who seemed confused, unsure of what was happening. 

"But…" he faded off and it made Draco want to hit him, to take the puzzled, slightly hurt look off of his face.

"I am not your friend!" he screamed, breathing heavily, panting, his eyes wide. Harry seemed scared, taken aback, and he should. "I saved you so I could kill you myself!" Harry's brows knitted and he opened his mouth, parting the lips Draco had just unwittingly kissed slightly. Draco spun around and hurried toward the door, roughly shouldering Hermione aside. He opened the door then slammed it loudly behind him.

Without a glance behind him he ran, going nowhere, anywhere, just somewhere different. He was so stupid, so completely and utterly stupid. He should have left Harry there, who knows, he probably wouldn't have even been hurt. After all, luck was always on Harry Potter's side… he never got hurt. Angrily, Draco threw open the door of a broom closet to his left. He fell against the wall and slowly slid down, banging his head against the wall. He hadn't saved Harry so he could kill him, he'd saved him because he was weak and he couldn't even let someone get hurt indirectly. He was pitiful and now everyone would know it. You couldn't just save the boy who lived and get away with it without anyone knowing, without anyone caring. By tomorrow everyone in the school would know that he'd gone out of his way to save Harry, and then his father would, and then You-Know-Who would, and then his life would be over. Angry, frustrated sobs tore at the back of his throat like savage animals. No one knew what was going on- Harry didn't know, Dumbledore didn't know. No one knew what plans were being made. He would have to think, he would have to find a way out of this, he would have to do something, for Merlin's sake. He couldn't die because of Harry Potter, and he wouldn't die for him. He just needed to think.


	3. A Little Bit is Still Something

"I don't know about you, but I'm thoroughly confused." Harry stared at his plate in a perplexed fashion, as though somewhere beneath its surface the answers laid.

"Maybe there's more to Malfoy than we thought." Hermione glanced at Harry thoughtfully.

Ron was still upset about yesterday and squeaked loudly at random intervals; he was often in deep thought about something that was troubling him deeply. Harry could only guess at what it was and really hoped Ron would move on before ever mentioning it, but, sadly, what you wish for doesn't always come true.

"Harry." Ron took in a deep breath and winced. "Is there something you need to tell us?"

Harry looked at him puzzled. "No."

"Are you sure?" Hermione shot a scathing glare in Ron's direction as he prattled on. Still confused, Harry continued in a completely naïve manner.

"I'm pretty sure I have nothing to tell you." Harry rolled his eyes and went back to eating his breakfast.

"Because," Ron took another deep breath, "I just want you to know that I support you, even though I may not like it-."

"Ron!" Harry's face twisted with disgust and realization as he yelled, quite rudely, though still deservingly, at his best friend. "I don't have a thing for Malfoy!"

Ron scrunched up his eyes and continued as though he hadn't heard a thing. "I mean, as far as blokes go, Malfoy's not that bad."

"What!" Harry's face paled and Ron went beet red.

"Well, I mean...um..."

"What Ron's trying to say, is that if you have any…feelings, Harry, you can talk to us."

"Nothing happened!" he exploded, glaring at each of his friends in turn. "I don't understand why neither of you will believe me when I tell you that. It's not like it's hard to imagine me not liking Malfoy." A sudden paranoia began to seep into his veins as he saw his friends sheepishly averting their eyes to the floor. "What's going on?" He looked at each of them in turn, wanting, needing an answer.

"We just don't want you to feel alone," Hermione said, flicking her eyes up to his. "Especially not now, not with all that's going on with Voldemort." Harry looked at Ron and he nodded in agreement. "Harry, these are hard times for everyone, and if there's any chance you're going through something that might make it harder, we want to help you." Harry surveyed them guiltily, a small, pleading smile across his lips.

"I'm sorry, guys, I shouldn't have acted like that; you were only trying to help."

"No problem, mate." Ron clapped him on the shoulder. "I would have gone bonkers too if someone had said I had a thing for that oaf." Ron and Harry exchanged smiles and the conversation was quickly turned towards Quidditch.

Draco fumed silently as he stood in front of his professor. His arms were folded tightly and a frown creased his face significantly.

"Would you like to tell me what, exactly, you were thinking?" If Draco's frown was thought to be formidable, it was nothing compared to the one his Potions master wore. After a short silence Snape raised his brow. "Well?" Draco mumbled something incoherently. "I don't have time for your games; speak up or leave."

"Well then, I guess I'll leave." Draco turned and walked to the door, which promptly slammed shut in his face.

"Get back here, Malfoy; I'm not finished with you." Draco ground his teeth for a moment before obeying. He stood and glared at Snape. "Now tell me what you were doing in the hospital wing with Mr. Potter."

"You've heard the story."

"Well then, care to explain why you didn't bring him somewhere more useful, say, to me?" Draco scanned the floor and Snape impatiently urged him on. "I'm waiting."

"I don't know," he replied quickly, not taking his eyes off of the floor. "I could have brought him to you, I could have done a number of things, I certainly thought about them, but I didn't."

Draco looked up at Snape with pleading eyes that begged for answers. "I tried to tell myself I did it so that the Dark Lord could kill him, but if that was true I would have brought him to you." He stopped for a moment and resigned himself, seeming to draw inward as he once again looked at the floor, seeing something that wasn't there. "I saw something, or, rather, felt it. I felt like I knew something, something to do with him; it was like I'd seen him in that position so many times before: lying on his back, completely helpless, and all I wanted to do was make it go away. It felt like I was hurting too. Like it hurt me that he was in pain; all I wanted to do was make it stop." He faded off into silence before looking up at his professor, his eyes sharp and piercing. "For me; I wanted to help him for me; so it wouldn't hurt anymore."

Snape stayed silent throughout the whole exchange and showed no change in emotion from what he had just heard. He seemed unsurprised, like he'd almost expected that answer. "Did it go away?"

Draco had been peering off into his unseen world again, thinking things through, and was shocked out of his reverie. "Did what go away?"

"The pain."

Draco breathed deeply through his nose. "No, it got worse, because now I want to help him and I know I can't." Draco stated it matter-of-factly, with a slightly hollow, almost bitter tinge to his voice.

"There are a lot of things we can't do." Draco looked up and Snape grabbed and held his eyes, looking deeply into their centers. "It is my duty to report what has just happened; how you will most likely be sympathetic to his cause." Draco's eyes grew large and his breath caught in his throat.

"But." And here Snape's eyes lost none of their intensity. "If, by some chance, I forget and find other pressing matters to attend to, don't be surprised." Snape looked at his desk and began going through some of the papers scattered there. "I'm a very busy man, Draco, and I do not have time for your silly problems, now leave." Snape's tone was harsh, but Draco's reaction was of relief, and he turned to the door with a barely contained sigh of release.

As he neared the door, Snape's voice carried to his ears. "Oh and, Draco, I'd tell your friends that the points were for catching Harry Potter and his friends using potions illegally on one another." Draco smiled, his back to his Potions master, before exiting the room.

"You don't think for once he could teach us how to make something simple, like pumpkin juice, now do you?" Ron said with an almost hopeful lilt to his voice. Harry sighed deeply, shaking his head.

"Of course not, that would be nice of him." Harry was grumpy, mind you, Potions pretty much always made him grumpy; there was just something about the whole atmosphere of the class. They were in a moldy dungeon with a mean teacher and a group of Slytherin classmates who hated them. That would make pretty much anyone grumpy.

"Be sure not to drink the potion," Snape droned in a bored tone. "Of course, Mr. Potter would know all about that, now wouldn't he?" Harry felt his cheeks go red as Ron glared at the Potions master. There was an eruption of laughter from the other side of the room as the Slytherins clapped Draco on the back and sniggered.

Harry's mouth fell open as he saw the smug expression plastered on Draco's face. He was smiling! Why was he smiling?! If anyone should be embarrassed it was Draco, yet there he was, being cheered on by his classmates as though he'd just won the Quidditch Cup. Wait a minute- no; Harry looked down at his cauldron. Draco couldn't have been…questing for him, could he? Was the entire "accidentally" falling on him incident really just so he could kiss him? Harry turned slightly green. What if the whole house had been in on it and they were just trying to shake him up? Or, maybe, Harry shuddered, maybe Draco…liked him, and not in a friendly type way. Maybe he'd gotten angry because Harry had treated him nicely, like a friend, when really what Draco wanted was to be more than his friend.

Harry gulped. What if Draco expected something from him? What if he thought that since Harry had been nice to Draco, it was an invitation to try and get closer to him? What, if by some horrible twist of fate, he and Harry somehow found themselves alone and Draco launched himself at Harry, impure intentions in mind? It was too much to bear! Harry snuck a quick glance in Draco's direction. He was adding ingredients to his cauldron with ease, apparently not even noticing the fact that Harry was alive.

Harry took in a deep breath. Now, when you are face to face with the possibility that someone may greatly like you, you have to size up said person and see whether you might, well, return the favor. Not that he liked Malfoy, but, if, perchance, Malfoy liked him, he had to see how bad a meeting between the two of them would be. He stealthily watched as Draco stirred the contents of his cauldron slowly, stirring back and forth, and then in a circle, around and around. The movements were so breathtakingly slow it hurt to watch, and Harry almost couldn't watch, but he had to, had to see the expression on the blonde's face as he moved back and forth in a slow, steady rhythm. Harry felt as if he would explode, the never ending movement now speeding up with need, now frenzied, faster and faster, harder, harder, HARDER-

"Bloody hell, is it You-Know-Who?!"

"What?" Harry spun around.

"Your face, mate, I thought you were gonna keel over; it looked like you were in pain. Is your scar hurting?"

"Um…." Harry's face went red. "Oh….yeah… I mean, yeah, Voldemort, right, scar."

Ron looked at his friend with concerned eyes. "You must have seen something pretty bad, it's messed you up right good. Are you okay?" Oh, boy.

Draco grinned to himself as he slowed the pace of his stirring. He may not like Potter, but it didn't mean he couldn't have fun with him. God only knows what Potter was thinking while he stared at him stirring the cauldron, probably had something to do with that Weasley girl.

Unless- no, he couldn't; it wasn't possible. Draco almost stopped stirring altogether as the dreaded thought formed in his mind. Unless Potter liked him…

This was not happening. Draco almost screamed the anger was building up so high in him. There he was, that stupid prat, staring at him…again. Harry's eyes had followed him ALL over the school, endlessly searching and always finding him. Draco groaned, he'd tried hiding everywhere and here, the library, had been his last option. Somehow, no matter what, that prick always knew exactly where he'd be. It was like Harry'd learned so much in the past day of watching him that he now knew everything there was to know about Draco. It seemed as though Draco thought something and Harry instantly knew exactly what Draco was thinking. It was like there was an unbreakable connection; a bond of some sort between them… Draco HATED it. In fact, he more than hated it, he wanted to pound it into bloody little clumps and then cut those clumps into smaller clumps and then feed those clumps to the giant squid. Actually, that was also what he wanted to do to Harry Potter as well. In fact, everything could get fed to the squid for all he cared.

What was the world coming to? He couldn't even go to the LIBRARY and enjoy some peace and quiet. The worst part, though, was the absolute and utter silence of everything. Sure, there were a few hushed whispers, but that was it. Just hushed whispers, the opening of books, and Harry's eyes. They didn't even seem to blink. Harry was hardly being inconspicuous; he hadn't even touched the book in front of him! And…and Draco couldn't even write a FUCKING LETTER TO SOME DEATH EATERS WITHOUT THAT ASSHOLE STARING AT HIM!

Draco was getting more annoyed by the second at the stupid look on Harry's face. Why couldn't he just leave Draco alone? Everything would be much easier that way. They didn't need to know each other, they just had to fight each other and glare at each other and that was good enough. They didn't need friendship, or even respective silence.

Draco glared down at the piece of parchment that stood in front of him, daring himself to write. He didn't want to write anything on it, didn't want to say anything to anyone, really. All he really wanted was to curl up on a bed and cuddle with someone. He just wanted someone to hold him and tell him everything was alright. He wanted to feel something besides empty and scared. He was scared of everyone close to him, scared of everyone far from him, and scared of the fact that, as a result, he was pushing everyone away. He didn't want to push people away. But he also didn't want Harry Potter to look at him. He just wanted Harry Potter to go away, to go and have fun with his miserable friends so Draco could plan other people's deaths.

Harry wasn't sure what was going on. There were all these little questions floating through his mind and he didn't know the answer to any of them. He didn't even want to answer them. All he wanted to do was walk across the room and give Draco a hug. Not because he was Draco Malfoy or because of any weird ideas of attractions or curiosity or anything like that. He just wanted to give Draco a hug because he'd never seen anyone look so sad in his life, and no one should be that sad. All he wanted to do was make all the bad go away and make everything else better. He didn't know how, or even why, but it just wasn't right that Draco should suffer- Harry didn't want to see him suffer.

More than anything, he just wanted Draco to break down and cry. Not because he was Draco Malfoy or even because Harry wanted to see him weak, just because there was so much bottled up inside of the boy that it hurt to watch. It hurt to watch because Harry saw more than he should and he knew that there was pain bubbling away beneath the blonde boy's cold surface, and he wanted to make it go away. Harry just wanted to hold him while he cried and make it all better because… because that's what he wanted to do. No one should keep all that bottled in and Harry thought that if Draco cried, maybe he would feel a little better. And all Harry wanted, more than anything, was for Draco to feel a little better.


	4. Developements of Noteriety

Chapter 4: Developments of Notoriety

Draco shivered violently against the cold stone floor. All he could feel was the cold hardness beneath him and that was all he wanted to feel, and yet flashes of green danced behind his eyes in sickening swirls; swirls that made him feel other things as well.

Regret was one of them, one of the harsh piercing emotions that seemed to bar and hold him hostage in their sick malice.

Loss and the fear of losing were also there. He felt the loss of things that had come and gone; the loss of warmth beneath him and he was scared of losing everything he had left.

The last thing he felt was hate. Blind, unmerciful hate that was strong and furious and lustful for revenge. He hated everyone and everything because there was so much he needed and so much he should have, so much he should've _had_, and yet his life was lacking. He should have had love but all he had was lonely emptiness. And because of that, he hated.

A small whimper escaped from his mouth, but it was quiet and it wasn't heard by anyone.

He pressed his forehead into the stone, trying to steady himself from the brutal tremors going through his body. His hand reached out for someone who wasn't there, someone who couldn't grasp him, and he didn't know who it was, or why he was doing it, simply that he was. He knew that he needed it and wanted it and he was empty without anything and all he was asking for was someone to hold his hand through it all.

Another shiver ran through him.

Harry whimpered and twisted around painfully. His arm stretched out and his fingers wrapped around some unseen object, his face contorted with pain and worry.

Harry looked at Draco curiously as the blonde's head came dangerously near to falling onto his desk. Mind you, he himself hadn't slept very well last night, so it was no wonder Draco was tired; night can be a very daunting time. He sighed and tried to pay attention to the Professor.

He was worried. It didn't make sense, and he didn't have anything to worry about, and yet he was worried. What was worse was that he couldn't tell his friends because then _they'd_ worry. Besides, this was more of a personal thing.

Something was wrong. Something had to be wrong. There had to be something going on. He sighed in frustration and turned back to his studies. Whatever it was, it would likely reveal itself in time. Not that he'd really wait long for it to happen before trying to figure it out, but he'd at least give it until lunch. Yes, lunch.

Draco stared at his plate and simply willed it to go away. He wanted it to go away; he wished it would go away. More than anything he wanted his plate to disappear because, if his plate could disappear, then maybe so could his problems. He sighed and, with a great swishing of his robes, left the table, heading towards the library, where he could at least escape his classmates. He didn't want to look at anyone; he just wanted to be alone so he could drown in self pity.

Harry saw Draco leave, and he saw the way he looked and the way he moved. He stood rooted to the spot for a moment, staring at his plate and trying to make up his mind.

He wasn't really sure what was going on, but, he had said he'd give everything until lunch, and, here it was, lunch. With a smile, he felt fully convinced he had every right to follow the Slytherin and see what he was thinking, and, more to the point, how he was feeling. Because Harry knew a sad person when he saw one, and Draco was the absolute picture of someone sad, complete with every single cliché thrown in.

Standing up, he made his way to the library, knowing full well that that was exactly where Draco would go when he was sad and wanted to be alone. He didn't question it at all.

Draco wiped at his nose and silently prayed that no one would decide to take a trip to the library to study, because his sobs were sure to alert anyone as to where he was and what he was doing. The only reason Madam Pince hadn't noticed was that he'd managed to get far enough from her desk that the sound was muffled enough not to attract her attention.

Move a little bit past her desk, however, and the sounds soon got louder and louder. He held himself close and wrapped his arms around his legs, resting his head on his knees.

He felt comfortable like that, it was like hugging a stuffed toy; it was a familiar thing to do whenever one was sad.

Harry's mouth fell open a bit as he saw Draco, with his shoulders heaving and his back trembling. He'd never seen Draco look more fragile, more delicate. His heart broke several times.

He was about to walk over to him, when Draco wiped his eyes and stood up. Harry hid behind a bookshelf as Draco walked by, a graceful ease to his step that Harry had never before noticed, or even thought to notice. He sat at a table, picked up a book and started to read through puffy, red eyes. Harry stood there for a few moments, simply watching him, trying to sift through his emotions. Then, he started to walk over.

Draco stared at the pages of the book with unseeing eyes. He'd been weak, that was all; he'd had a weak moment and was lucky that someone hadn't seen him. He felt, rather than heard, someone approaching. He looked up and his eyes were greeted with the sight of Harry, his face warm with a caring expression.

Draco's heart skipped a beat. Oh, shit.

"Are you okay?" Harry asked thoughtfully and Draco gave him the dirtiest look he could and flexed his jaw.

"No, I am not," he said, enunciating each word carefully. "I seem to have an ignorant twat following me around, and it's starting to annoy the hell out of me." Draco glared and Harry simply raised an eyebrow.

"Are you sure that's what's bothering you?" Harry was _obviously_ goading him and it irked the hell out of Draco.

Draco stood up, his face leering at Harry. "You stupid prick, what would-" Draco's eyes flew open as he felt Harry's arms encircle him.

What the fuck was he doing? At first Draco had thought he was trying to attack him, but now it seemed unlikely as Potter just stood there, his body pressing into Draco's. He knew he should throw Harry off, or at least yell something horribly mean and hurtful at him before leaving. Perhaps a punch or too would be good also, they'd be well deserved, to say the least.

But Draco didn't. He almost though he didn't want to, but that, of course, wasn't the case, because why the hell wouldn't he want to beat the bloody daylights out of Potter, especially after this…"incident"?

And yet, as sure as Draco was of the fact that he _hated _Potter, and that he wanted nothing more than to pull away and shove him into the table, Draco couldn't help but notice the slight warmth that radiated from the other boy's body, the slightly nice smell of his hair.

The slight feeling of shelter, like this boy, _Potter_, this annoying idiot, was some sort of house. Some sort of place that Draco could just… be in and not worry.

And suddenly Draco was hit with the thought that sometime in his life, some time that was a bit fuzzy and not all that clear, he'd had that. He'd had some sort of shelter that he could call his.

And it was that thought that made him start to cry. A stupid, fleeting thought that really had no meaning at all, and now he was left doubting whether he had any sanity left. Because Malfoy's do not cry because of fleeting thoughts and they certainly don't do it in the arms of idiotic Gryffindors like Potter.

They just don't.

Harry was quite sure he'd lost his mind. It was one thing to think about hugging someone like Malfoy, a crazy, stupid thing, but certainly not something one would check oneself into the loony bin over. However, _actually_ hugging someone like Malfoy, well, that was just disturbing.

As was the fact that Harry was enjoying it.

Yes, Malfoy was as stiff as a board and most likely the only thing that kept Malfoy from cursing him into oblivion was shock, but there was something nice about the other boy. It was nice to feel his arms around Malfoy and it was nice the way Harry could feel the other boy's breath on his ear. And Harry was almost sure that at one point he'd actually heard Draco sniff, almost like he was sad, like he was crying. Of course, this hadn't really happened, but Harry, for some inexplicable reason, wanted to pretend it had. Because this all felt so nice.

It was a slightly natural feeling, and that scared the shit out of him more than anything.

Hugging Malfoy would never be natural.

Harry had the sudden thought that he should probably let go. It had been a little while and still Malfoy was rigid and the situation was only bound to get worse if he continued like this.

And then Malfoy shifted slightly, he may have been reaching for his wand or he may have just been uncomfortable, but in that moment Malfoy's body aligned with Harry's and Malfoy's cheek brushed against his.

It was then that he heard a familiar squeak.

Harry stilled. Swallowing, Harry moved away slowly, sparing a glance Malfoy's way. Malfoy's face was frozen with a horrified look, completely unmoving.

He looked over at Ron and Hermione in a frightened manner, squeamish as to what they might say.

"Can't you find some broom closet to have sex in?! Why do you always have to do it when I'm around?" Ron was in hysterics, throwing his hands in the air and ranting about rooms and privacy. "Bedroom good, library BAD!"

"He should be put down," Malfoy said, as he stared at Ron in disgust (he appeared to have broken out of his horror-filled trance). "Before he hurts himself, or, more importantly, someone else." Raising his eyebrow as he passed Ron, Draco exited the room, obvious revulsion on his face. Harry watched him go and was almost sad.

Harry winced as he glanced at Hermione whose face, if it was possible, was redder than his.

"What-"

"Don't ask, just don't." Harry held up his hand to stop her.

"Why do you always have to touch each other when I'm around?!" Ron wailed.

"We were just hugging!"

"You were touching him!"

"Yeah, but," Harry sputtered, at a loss for words. "It wasn't, like, bad, or anything."

"You had your arms around him!"

"Ron," Hermione put a hand on his shoulder. "It's okay." She stroked his arm reassuringly.

"But every time I see them…" he wailed into his hands.

Hermione winced at something Harry wasn't sure about. "Ron, it's only happened _twice_."

He picked his face up out of his hands and glared at her. "It was a rough two times."

It was Harry's turn to burry his face in his hands. "Kill me now, _please_."

Hermione rolled her eyes. "Will both of you stop with the drama, it was just a hug."

"They were touching."

"People touch!" Harry yelled.

"So you WERE touching!"

"ARRRGH!" Harry launched himself at Ron, who swatted him with his hand. They were soon in a full-fledged fight, both swinging their hands and slapping at each other.

"STOP IT!" Roared Hermione, as she pulled them apart with more strength than they ever thought possible; they were, after all, two almost full grown boys. Actually, they were probably wimps (hello, slapping?), so, in retrospect, it wasn't that surprising.

They panted, glaring daggers at each other as Hermione held them apart. "This solves nothing," she said irritably.

"He hit me!" Ron pointed at Harry accusingly and Harry roared at Ron with accusations, and soon they were once again fighting, or, slapping.

"STOP!" Hermione held her wand at them and they froze. "Or else…" They looked at each other for a second, wondering just how bad she'd get them, she _was_ their best friend, after all. Mind you, she seemed pretty pissed…

Hermione raised her eyebrows and, when no one moved, she lowered her wand. "You're both so immature; I can't believe you'd fight over something like that." She gave them a stern look and they stared at the floor sheepishly.

"About time, I thought Hermione was going to jump on you all, and we know how much she'd love that." Hermione's cheeks tinted a deep, angry red color as Pansy Parkinson smirked behind her.

With a feral cry, Hermione pounced onto Parkinson and began beating the crap out of her. Ron and Harry stared, transfixed, their mouths hanging open, as Hermione landed blow after blow on Pansy.

After the first few initial punches, Pansy started to fight back and soon there was a full on brawl, as both girls struggled to get on top of each other.

"Harry, this is bloody awesome." Ron looked like he was going to explode with a surge of utter happiness and Harry was torn between laughing and dying of shock. When the biting turned to kissing and the hitting turned to groping, however, all amusement he had left.

The boys watched, star-struck, as Pansy and Hermione had a complete snog-fest on the floor of the library. Harry looked at Ron and thought that he was going to faint.

"Um, Ron?"

Ron looked at him, his face pale and a smile gleaming on his face. "God loves me, he really does."


	5. Okay

Chapter Five

An awkward silence hung in the air. It was awkward, it was silent and it was very hangy, being as it was in the air. In conclusion, not only was there an awkward silence hanging in the air, but Harry was slowly going insane and needed very quickly to stop thinking because all his thoughts were either incredibly disturbing or having to do with completely mundane and unassuming things such as awkward silences hanging in the air. Yes, he definitely needed to stop thinking.

Hermione looked at the floor, a furious blush tinting her cheeks. Pansy just seemed bored and she looked around in an annoyed manner. Ron had his arms crossed as he leaned back in his chair. He peered at the two girls with a judgelike stare.

"How long have you two been seeing each other?" Ron said.

"Umm…about a month." Hermione stammered a bit and her blush became all the brighter.

"Interesting…" Ron stroked his chin thoughtfully. "Have you two had sex?"

"What!?" Hermione looked as if she was about to die on the spot and Harry found himself having very disturbing thoughts.

"It's a simple question." Ron said, acting like he was about twenty years older than the rest of them.

"Loads of times." Ron froze and Pansy smiled. "In fact, we fucked in this room." A silence hung in the air as everyone, except Pansy, of course, was frozen with shock, and in some cases, sheer terror.

"Eeh…." Ron opened his mouth and tried to make a sound but wind merely came out.

"On that chair." Pansy grinned evilly as Ron paled considerably and stood up. He folded his arms and was once again composed.

"You have to wonder about the effect this is going to have on Harry."

"What do you mean?" Harry asked, appalled.

Ron continued on as if Harry wasn't even there. "I mean, he's an impressionable young boy. Who knows what he could take out of this."

"Young boy! You're the same age as me!"

"We wouldn't want him to get any ideas. The next thing you know, he could be gallivanting around with someone of the same sex."

"I am not gay!"

"Maybe a Slytherin, a rude Slytherin even. Perhaps a sarcastic, mean-"

"I DO NOT HAVE A THING FOR MALFOY!"

Ron looked at him, stunned, as if he'd just arrived there. "Why, Harry, whatever gave you that idea? I was talking about Blaise."

Harry growled in frustration. He jumped out of his chair and headed towards the door.

"Weasley, you should go after him. Hermione and I'll be fine here…alone…together…" Pansy grinned in a sadistic manner.

Harry stopped and turned around again, a smile plastered to his face. "You know, Ron, I have to wonder what affect this may have on you."

Ron gulped. "What do you mean?"

"Well, I just wonder if, after seeing them together, you might wonder what it's like, the same sex that is."

"Harry, get over it." He seemed to be backing away, his tone scared and defensive.

"I mean, who knows, you might just wonder what it's like to be with a Slytherin. Maybe even a rude, sarcastic, mean-"

"I DO NOT HAVE A THING FOR BLAISE!"

Harry blinked. "Why, Ron, I was referring to Malfoy."

Now, this wasn't as bad as it seemed. He may have been found hugging Harry Potter, but it was possible that he had fallen into Harry Potter's arms and therefore Harry had only been catching him and everyone would simply assume there was no hugging of any type or sort involved. Yes, that was definitely what happened. His thoughts were rudely interrupted by Pansy as she swaggered into the room.

"Where have you been?" he asked as he propped himself up on his elbows. She stopped and glanced at him sprawled on the couch.

"Doing inappropriate things to Hermione Granger." She said in a bored voice before turning her attention to pulling out all the cushions from the furniture in the common room.

"Funny, now where were you really?" He most definitely was not in the mood for such jokes and very quickly became annoyed by Pansy's lack of seriousness.

"Straddling that Granger girl." Draco rolled his eyes and sighed exasperatedly.

"Honestly Pansy," he began as Pansy began looking through the cushions underneath him. "Can't you take something ser-" his face paled as Pansy held up a Gryffindor tie.

"I knew I left it around here."

"On the couch I'm laying on."

"Yes."

"You had sex on the couch I'm laying on."

"Yes, God."

"I don't think you realize the gravity of the situation." Pansy raised an eyebrow.

"The gravity of the situation?"

Draco sighed. "Yes, I now have mudblood cum on me! Do you know how horrible that is?" Draco threw his arms into the air.

"I've actually had mudblood cum on me almost every day." Draco grimaced.

"I really didn't need that image."

"Are you done freaking out?" Pansy asked.

Draco sighed. "Yeah." He sat there for a moment and Pansy waited patiently. Then his face screwed up again. "Aah!" he jumped off the couch and wiped off his robes in a disgusted fashion. He sighed dejectedly. "I just can't grasp the fact that you and Granger were," he wrinkled his nose. "Together."

"Me neither." Draco looked up at her.

"Really?"

"I never thought she'd want me. We've only been dating for about a month but I've been into her for almost a year."

Draco nodded. "And I never knew."

Pansy punched him lightly in the arm. "Don't beat yourself up about it; you have other things to worry about than petty gossip."

"So everyone knew?"

"I've never been good at the discreet method."

"You yelled it at her in the middle of a crowd, didn't you?"

"Yup."

Draco smiled. "I've always wanted to do that."

Pansy grinned back. "It was pretty interesting."

"I'm just sad you beat me to it."

She looked at him slyly. "Well, you could try it with a certain Gryffindor."

Draco narrowed his eyes. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Well, I thought if I said Hufflepuff you'd be a little upset with me."

"The fact that I wouldn't have sex with a Hufflepuff doesn't mean there's anything wrong with them." He pouted.

"All I'm saying is that if you found someone of the same sex that you found mildly agreeable you could try it." She was grinning form ear to ear and Draco slouched back in his seat glaring.

"Mmph." He said looking away.

Pansy got up and walked to the girls' dormitory. She stopped when she got there and turned to him, a smile on her face. "Thank you, Draco, for accepting this; I'm not sure anyone else will."

He didn't say anything, but his eyes met hers. Then she turned again and entered the dormitory, leaving Draco to his thoughts.

Draco was fuming in his seat. How was he expected to study when he had that stupid Potter staring at him, again? That stupid idiot had some sort of twinkling look in his eyes as he stared at Draco. Honestly, did the boy get off on watching him read? Draco ground his teeth savagely; sending murderous glares Harry's way. Obviously, he didn't take the hint.

Now, Harry wasn't an expert on such things, but was Draco looking at him with lust in his eyes? They seemed to be holding some powerful fiery emotion behind them and other than lust he wasn't quite sure what it could be. He was feeling a little discontented with the fact that Draco was not only following him everywhere, he was sending him hungry looks. Harry shifted in his seat uncomfortably. Why did he like him so much? Harry could understand maybe giving him glances every now and then, but following him? It was down right creepy. Well, he supposed he should do the right thing and let Draco know that he wasn't interested, it was only fair. After all, the boy was making a fool of himself.

Draco groaned as he saw Harry make his way towards him. If he thought he was going to hug him again he definitely had another thing coming.

"Draco?" Harry asked, wringing his hands nervously.

"Yes, Potter?" Draco drawled.

"I think we should talk about your feelings for me." There was a silence and Harry winced as Draco fixed him with his worst glare.

"My feelings?"

"Ye…yes." Harry stuttered feeling just slightly intimidated.

Draco growled low in his throat. "Potter, I don't know what universe you've been living in, but the only feelings I have for you are loathing and hate."

"Really?" Harry looked dumbfounded.

"Yes, really! I think we should be talking about YOUR feelings stalker-boy!"

"I don't have feelings for you," Harry sputtered. "I thought you had feelings for me!"

"Well I don't." Draco said coldly.

"Okay." Harry said before he turned and walked away. Wait a second, Harry didn't like him? What kind of a lie was that?! He had just been staring at him! What was wrong with him? …What if he really didn't like him? Draco frowned. That idiotic prat, he obviously didn't know beauty when he saw it. Draco would make him BEG for it. In fact, he'd do that right now. The sooner the boy was awakened from his obvious denial the better.

Draco stood up, walked briskly to Potter, grabbed his shoulder, spun him around, grabbed his face with both hands and planted a kiss right on his lips. Harry's eyes went wide. Draco drew away and took in Harry's shocked expression with a smile.

"You so want me." He said before walking out the door.

Harry stood there for a few moments before uttering out an intelligent, "Meep."

Harry stared at the ceiling, his mind trying to sort through his thoughts. Draco, he wanted to talk to Draco. He didn't know why, but the overwhelming need to just see him was nagging beneath his skin. He closed his eyes and smiled, knowing exactly where he'd be.

Draco was leaning against the wall of the empty room, his arms wrapped protectively around his legs. He always felt comfortable like that, safe and secure, like someone was holding him and protecting him. He sighed as he heard the door open.

"I thought you were over this stalker phase."

"I just wanted to see you."

"Sure you're not a homosexual."

"What!?"

Draco sighed again. "What do you want, Potter?" Harry bit his lip.

"Don't you feel it?" he peered at Draco questioningly.

Draco rolled his eyes. "Feel what?"

"You have to feel it!" Harry howled. Draco's brows furrowed as he looked at Harry, confused.

"What are you talking about?"

"I mean," Harry gestured with his hands, becoming frantic. "You have to feel something." A tear rolled down his cheek and Draco was struck by it, by watching it slide down. "There's something…there." Harry gestured with his hands trying to figure out what to say. "It's…there." His voice cracked as another tear rolled down his cheek. "I don't know what, but, it…it just is."

Draco stood up and went to him but Harry backed away. "There's something between us and I can't pretend there isn't anymore." He looked at Draco seriously.

"Okay." Draco said softly.

"Okay?" Harry asked. Draco nodded as he came closer. Harry backed into a wall and his eyes closed a bit as Draco's hands cupped his face.

"Okay." Draco whispered into his ear. Harry shivered and Draco slowly pressed his lips into Harry's, a soft pressure joining them together. Harry's hand came up to Draco's head and softly touched it. He opened his mouth and Draco's tongue slowly entered his mouth. It was so soft, so light, so gentle and unassuming. It was beautiful.

Harry whimpered softly and Draco slid his hand onto the small of his back, pulling him closer. Harry complied, feeling himself pushed against Draco. He felt so, so nice. Draco tasted so good, too, and he smelled euphoric. Harry's legs spread open oh-so-slightly and Draco found himself in between them. Draco pulled away, panic in his eyes.

"I think I want to stop."


	6. What Was the Date Again?

A/N: So, it's been awhile. Well, at least it seems like it's been awhile to me. Thanks to my betas Ruth and Erica, you guys were lots of help. Also, I'd like to say that this has been an absolute rollercoaster, especially with the upcoming chapters. I'd like to thank everyone for reading this far and I promise I already have like the next two chapters already written. Also, there is a bit of, ahem, "love" going on, and there hasn't really been any of that before now, and there'll probably be some more of that later on. smile Anyways, enjoy!

"Why?" Harry was shocked and rejected and slightly angry. Draco understood that, but at that moment he didn't really care. Draco ran his hand through his hair as he shook convulsively. "You can't just do that and walk away from it!"

"Harry, stop." Draco was backing away, his hand tightly clasping his arm.

"Draco," Harry's voice was noticeably softer. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

"Then why are you-"

"Because!" Draco screamed at him. A silence fell over the room as Harry stared at Draco, whose eyes were wild and scared like a cornered mouse's. Draco's breathing was ragged and harsh, its noise taking up the space that their voices had once held. Harry's eyes turned determined and Draco saw him visibly bend his knees. Draco's eyes widened. "Harry, no! Oomph!"

Draco's body collided with the floor as Harry's rammed into him. There was a gush of wind and then Harry's breath tickled Draco's face. Draco slowly became aware of the position they were in: Draco's legs were parted and Harry's arms were by Draco's head. Harry looked at Draco through his eyelashes and Draco couldn't help but feel slightly vulnerable.

"What are you-" Draco said before Harry placed a soft kiss on his lips.

"Don't talk." He said, his lips barely a centimeter away from Draco's. Draco closed his eyes and decided that, perhaps, it didn't feel too bad. Harry smiled and kissed him again, and this time Draco kissed back. It was slow, tentative, gentle and completely unlike their usual interactions. "Draco…" Harry whispered into the kiss. Draco reached up and wrapped his arms around Harry's neck.

Harry kissed Draco's jaw and trailed his hand down Draco's stomach. He stopped when he came to the top of Draco's trousers.

"Can I?" Harry asked shyly, looking imploringly into Draco's eyes. They stayed like that for a long moment before Draco slowly nodded. Harry smiled and gradually slipped his hand down Draco's trousers. Draco let out a cry and arched as he felt Harry's hand close around him.

Harry leaned into Draco's ear. "Now who's the homosexual?" Draco looked at him stunned for a moment before laughing. Harry grinned and kissed Draco deeply, Draco's arms tightening their hold. Draco threw his head back and groaned as he felt Harry begin to move his hand.

Draco's nails dug into Harry's back and Draco felt him shiver. Not that Draco was really able to pay attention, not with the delightful pressure building up in his groin.

"Mmm…Harry…"

"Yes?" Harry asked grinning.

"Harry, I…ohhh…" Draco squeezed his eyes shut.

"Yes, Draco?"

"Ah!"

"Perhaps I should stop?"

"No!" Harry laughed. Draco bit his lip and thrust his hips forward before cumming with a shuddering scream. Then he went perfectly limp.

Harry smiled and leaned forward, peppering Draco's face with kisses. Draco smiled sleepily.

"Harry?" he mumbled quietly.

"Yes?" Harry muttered between kisses.

"I'm tired."

Harry laughed softly. "I can see that."

"Do you want me to…?"

"It's okay."

"Are you sure?"

Harry laughed again. "Yes, Draco, it's fine."

"I, just, I mean it's not very fair and-"

"Shhhh…" Harry gently stroked Draco's hair. "Just sleep."

"Here?"

"Yes." Harry kissed Draco's ear before laying his head on Draco's chest. There was a long silence in which Harry found himself almost asleep.

"Harry?"

Harry groaned. "What?"

"You're going to stay, right?"

Harry lifted his head and looked into Draco's scared eyes. "Yeah, I'm staying." Draco closed his eyes and nodded. Harry smiled and leaned his head back down. "What could ever make me leave?" he said to himself.

Draco smiled sleepily as he looked down at the messy, black hair scattered across his chest. Harry yawned and looked around curiously before his eyes landed on Draco.

"Morning, sleepy-head." Draco said. Harry grinned.

"Morning." Harry lifted himself into a sitting position. "What time is it?"

"No idea."

"What day is it?"

"No clue."

Harry looked at Draco, his brows knitted. "Well, what day was it yesterday?"

Draco opened his mouth but then shook his head. "I have no idea."

"Right…" Harry looked around uncertainly. "I guess we should get going then." He laughed.

"I can't believe neither of us knew what day it was." Harry shook his head.

"I could have sworn it was Tuesday."

Harry rolled his eyes. "Tuesday was a couple of days ago."

"You sure?" Draco looked at him speculatively.

"Yes, I'm very sure. I'm also very sure that today is Friday."

"How do you know?"

"Because I have astronomy on Thursdays and I had astronomy yesterday."

Draco groaned. "Fine then, what class do we have now?"

Harry stopped. "Umm…"

"You're not serious!" Harry shrugged apologetically. Draco threw his arms up in frustration. "Why am I always stuck with you?"

"You're never stuck with me!"

"I am during all the bad times." Harry groaned as Draco carried on. "We don't even know what class we have!"

"Draco, it's going to be fine."

"This is all your fault! 'Let's go meet and snog all night.' Oh yes, 'cause I'm Harry Potter and I'm brilliant!"

"What, that wasn't my idea?!"

"Really, great idea!" Draco stomped around in circles.

"You are such a drama queen!"

"I am not a queen!"

"What?! Of all the things I say that's the one you hear!"

"Just because you don't care if you fail school doesn't mean I'm a drama queen!"

"Will you stop yelling?!"

"You stop yelling!"

"What is going on here?" McGonagall glowered down at them.

"We got lost, Professor." Harry said as Draco paled.

"Again?" she mumbled quietly before returning her attention to the boys. "Indeed, I suppose it would be in your best interest to miss your first class, seeing as there is about five minutes left and you'd only get yourself into more trouble by showing up. However, after that I suppose you should head over to the potions classroom."

"Thank you, Professor." Harry smiled.

"I suggest you hurry up, it wouldn't do to be late for your next class as well. And you're welcome." She left in a swirl of robes.

"Well, that was close." Harry's grin slipped off his face as he saw Draco's narrowed eyes. "What?"

"She was awful nice to you."

"She's a nice person…"

"I've never seen her smile at a student before."

"She didn't smile!"

"There was a twitch."

"Draco, what are you getting at?!"

"Nothing," Draco said looking away. "Nothing at all."

"What, you, just…Ahhhh!" Harry threw his arms up in the air, much like Draco had, and made his way to the Gryffindor room to get his things, muttering all the while about Draco and his weird issues.

God, he was gorgeous. Harry smiled dreamily and leaned forward in his seat, eyes fixed on the adorable way Draco chewed on his quill. It was the cutest thing he'd ever seen. Maybe he should buy him some more, maybe even those candy ones. Yeah, that's what he'd do next Hogsmeade weekend. In fact, he'd buy him a whole box full of them.

Harry silently wondered what type of shampoo Draco used. Draco's hair was so soft; he had to use some really good stuff. Maybe his hair was just naturally that soft. And that colour, Harry couldn't imagine Draco ever dying his hair, but he had the most amazing shade of blonde.

"Hermione." Ron whimpered.

Hermione sighed. "Yes, Ron."

"There's something wrong with Harry…"

Maybe he could take Draco somewhere. He knew Draco had probably gone to more places than Harry could ever dream of, but maybe he could take Draco to someplace like a zoo. He could show Draco the snakes, he might like that. Harry tried to picture Draco's face as it lit up with wonder and excitement. Maybe he should ask him if he wanted to go somewhere the next Hogsmeade weekend…

"Oh, Ron, leave him alone."

"But, Hermione..." Ron's voice went up several syllables.

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because. No."

"Please."

"No."

"Come on, it'll be fun."

"I'd rather die."

"Nobody's going to notice."

Draco raised an eyebrow. "Nobody's going to notice that two arch enemies are eating lunch together?"

"Nope."

"I don't know why, but I just don't believe you."

"They're going to find out sometime."

"No, no they're not."

"Draco." Harry said sternly.

"I hate you."

Harry smiled. "See you at noon."


	7. Close Call and the Mingled Smell of Hair

A/N: Ah, l'amore! Sorry it took so long, and sorry it's so short (at least, it seems short to me...). Thanks to my beautiful betas (who I'm assuming are beautiful because I have no idea what they look like) and all the people who have taken the time to review. I really appreciate it. Hopefully updates will be coming quicker.

"Are you sure you can't come?" Hermione tilted her head and smiled. Harry stared at her fingers, intertwined with Pansy's, and felt a smile break out across his face.

"Yeah, I got loads of homework."

"Well, don't work too hard." Ron grinned and clapped Harry's back.

"Yes, Harry, you need to find someone." Hermione grinned warmly.

Ron laughed. "Yeah, and if you can find someone who thinks _your_ hair is sexy, then I'd say go for marriage." Harry rolled his eyes and ignored the comment aimed at him.

"Did I miss anything?" Blaise came up behind Pansy and gave Ron an appraising look. "Hello."

Ron turned five shades of red and laughed nervously. "H-h-hi."

Pansy leaned closer to Harry. "They so want each other." Harry laughed and they exchanged knowing smiles.

"See you later." Harry waved after his friends and made certain they were out of sight before whipping on his cloak. Oh God, he better not be late.

Harry was late. Draco was not impressed. He glanced at the clock with a frown. Harry had said noon. It was now four after noon. Harry had one minute to get there before Draco was leaving.

"I'm… so…sorry." A bedraggled Harry collapsed into the seat across from Draco, who fixed him with a death glare.

"I'm not impressed."

"I know."

"You're late."

"I know."

Draco mentally shot lightning at Harry, who gave him an apologetic smile in return.

"Have I told you lately how much I hate you?" Draco said through gritted teeth.

"You may have mentioned it." Harry grinned as he picked up his cup of tea and breathed in the sweet aroma. It was exactly the way he liked it: two sugars, one cream.

"Why did we have to meet again?" Draco looked around in a bored way.

Harry put his cup down and rolled his eyes. "I want to talk to you."

"You didn't seem to want to talk last night."

"What! I didn't even get any!" Harry said before paling as he noticed a woman staring at them with a disapproving frown. "Marshmallows. I didn't get any marshmallows."

Draco smirked. "I guess you're going to be staying away from my," he paused smugly. "Marshmallows."

"I didn't do anything!" Harry lifted Draco raised an eyebrow. "We're not even dating and already I'm cut off from sex."

"Sex? Aren't you the ambitious one?"

Harry narrowed his eyes. "You didn't even want to come here with me and now you're acting like we've been going out for years."

Draco shrugged and held his cup close to his face, partially hiding his smile. Harry seethed in his seat.

"Do your friends know you're here?"

"No." Harry admitted.

"Ah, so you're hiding this."

"I'm not hiding anything!"

"Usually when you're ashamed of doing something you're doing something wrong." Draco nodded knowledgably.

"What are you saying?"

Draco shrugged innocently. "I'm just saying it's been awhile since you broke the rules."

"You are NOT my way to rebel." Harry's hands came down onto the table in an angry fashion that would have made a great deal of noise, had he not had enough control to hit it lighter than he wanted.

"Just checking." Draco whispered into his tea. "So, are you ready for the Quidditch game?"

"What? You're changing the subject that quickly?" Harry asked suspiciously.

"Do you want to talk about how repulsive your life is and how restricted your privileges are going to be?"

"So, the game…" Harry launched into a description of his training schedule. The subject was changed almost immediately by Draco, who quickly vowed to never bring up Quidditch again.

"Yet again ambitious." Draco smirked.

Harry sighed. "When you followed me here I assumed you wanted to come in."

Draco averted his eyes and his smirk died away. There was a moment of silence where Draco simply looked ashamed, as though he were fighting with what to say and whether he wanted to say it. "I'm just not comfortable sharing my body with anyone, Harry." Draco bit his lip and looked up at Harry through his lashes.

Harry instantly felt bad. He held up his hands. "I won't try anything, I promise." Draco nodded and Harry smiled.

"Toadstool." The portrait of the fat lady swung open. Harry winked before softly laying his invisibility cloak over Draco. Then, Harry made the tension filled walk into the common room. Harry knew Draco was invisible, however, when one goes to a school such as Hogwarts, one expects the unexpected. As such, Harry was a little worried someone would see through his cloak, or, rather, someone wouldn't.

Harry said, nervously, "How's it goin'?" Seamus, who was sitting in a puffy arm chair, looked up from his book and smiled.

"It's alright I s'pose. Didn't feel like seeing anyone?" Harry froze on his way into the dormitory. Unfortunately, Draco didn't stop, and instead crashed right into Harry. They fell with a loud smack and laid, Draco on top of Harry, on the floor.

Harry laughed nervously. "Seeing anyone? I'm not seeing anyone."

Seamus stared at Harry with wide eyes. "Did something just push you down?"

"NoahhH!" Harry let out a yelp as he felt Draco's hand go down his pants. Harry jerked his knee up and was satisfied when he heard a slight gush of air. "Ha, ha, that's funny." He laughed nervously again and, trying to look as inconspicuous as he could, somehow managed to push Draco off of him. "See you later." Harry stood up and tried to look nonchalant.

Seamus eyed him suspiciously. "Bye."

Harry stepped into the dorm room and let out a great sigh.

"You idiot!" he swerved furiously, glaring at the spot where he thought Draco was likely to be. "What happened to 'I don't want to share my body with anyone'? You asshole." Harry fumed silently for a moment. What an idiot! What a lying, conniving, stupid, prick! Why would he do that? What if Seamus had seen him? Harry stood there, still glaring, for a few more minutes before suddenly wondering why the room was so quiet. "Draco?" he looked around, his blood becoming very cold. "Draco, are you- oomph!"

Harry landed with a solid thump on the bed. He looked up at Draco's face with a frown. "You asshole."

Draco smiled dreamily. "Come now, Harry, I was being coy."

"Coy? That was being coy? I was worried about you!"

"Now or then?" Draco furrowed his eyebrows.

"Then, Draco, when you said you weren't ready or whatever the fuck it was."

"Oh, honestly, Harry, what was the other day then?" Draco raised an eyebrow.

Harry thought for a moment. "Well, umm, I… don't know…a fluke?"

Draco laughed. "A fluke?" Harry glared up at him and Draco leaned down to Harry's ear and whispered, "It was worth it to see your face; I have to say I like seeing you surprised and scared." Draco deftly licked Harry's ear.

Harry smiled, all anger forgotten, as Draco rested his forehead and nose on Harry's.

"Draco?"

"Yes?"

"Do…do… do you think my hair's ugly?" Harry looked sheepish and a bit embarrassed; a bright blush crept up his cheeks.

Draco laughed and lifted his head, gazing down at Harry in his delicious state. "I think your hair's sexy."

Harry kissed the top of Draco's nose before sinking back into the pillows, his face, if possible, even redder than before. Draco smirked before kissing him deeply. Harry smile and bit his lip, his aforementioned hair mussed and everywhere. "I must say," Draco said.

"Your hair is actually one of your best features."

Harry raised an eyebrow. "Is that so?"

Draco leaned in again, ghosting his lips over Harry's. "Mmhm." Harry laughed and Draco softly bit Harry's lower lip. Harry shifted so that Draco was in between his legs. Draco's hand was slowly undoing the buttons on Harry's shirt. Harry let Draco's tongue into his mouth as Draco slowly teased Harry's shirt open.


	8. A Means to Hold Your Hand

Draco hummed happily and was secretly glad that no one was around; he wouldn't be able to bear it if someone saw him like this, all happy and like. Draco didn't know what was wrong with him! But, Harry… Ah! He felt like screaming at the top of his lungs at the rest of the world. Harry was just so…amazing! And…and Harry liked him. Harry liked him: Draco Malfoy. Why, it was too good to be true, but it was true, Harry had even said so. Harry had said that he loved him, Draco Malfoy. He was loved.

There was a skip in Draco's step as he made his way to the Slytherin common room. The smile, however, slid off his face as he entered the place that had been like a second home to him.

"Hello." A voice said. Draco paled considerably before composing his features.

"I have to say, I wasn't expecting you." Draco said coolly.

"You weren't supposed to." Draco raised an eyebrow quizzically. "How are things?"

"Things are fine." Draco gazed indifferently at the man intruding on his life.

"Don't forget, you have a job to do."

"I haven't."

"Good, because I wouldn't like to think what would happen otherwise." The man glared down at the young boy, who gritted his teeth at such a comment.

"Is that a threat?" There was a heavy thud as Draco hit the ground.

"Arrogant little asshole! You will refer to me with the respect I deserve!" Draco closed his eyes against the pain not only where the man's fist had hit his head, but in the back of his head, which had hit the floor. Without a sound, Draco got to his feet.

"I will have it to you soon." Draco said like nothing had happened. As far as he was concerned, nothing had happened really, he had stepped out of his place; he had gotten what he deserved, end of story. No, being hit didn't scare him at all, something else did.

"I look forward to it." With a quick nod the man was through the fireplace and gone; away. Amazing, the profound influence that man had on Draco's life. It was funny; Draco would probably never meet him again.

He was running blindly, and crying. Was he crying? Yes, hot streams ran down his cheeks and his breath caught and hitched. His robes were wet and he wanted to rid himself of their sticky confines.

"Toadstool." He coughed out the word and sprinted up the stairs; sprinted all the way into the boys' dormitory.

Harry wasn't sleeping, not yet, but he was very close, in the realm just before. That is, until Draco ripped the curtains from his bed. Cursing, Harry cast a silencing charm around his bed.

"Draco? Draco what's wrong?" The boy was blubbering and sobbing all over the place and scaring the hell out of Harry.

"I…think…" Draco sobbed between every word, holding himself together by a frayed thread. "I want to leave. We'll…" he looked around desperately, thinking. "We'll leave together!" He reached forward suddenly and grabbed Harry's face, wrenching it close to his. "Okay?" Draco's shallow gasps hit Harry's face.

Harry forced his face closer and locked their lips together. Harry's hands came up to cradle Draco's face and Draco held on to him fiercely, pulling Harry closer and latching on to him savagely, almost…desperately? Harry broke the kiss and panted, his face inches from Draco's.

"What's wrong?" Harry asked again, his thumb soothing Draco's face.

"Nothing."

"Draco…" Harry breathed out his name.

"Let's just sleep." Draco said quickly.

"Draco!" Harry said crossly, startling Draco slightly. "You can't just run in here like this and then dismiss it! Now tell me." Draco was silent. "Tell me…" Harry said softly, his breath ghosting over Draco's face. "Just tell me…" Draco was silent still. Harry's face turned stern. "Draco!"

"I love you." The words jumbled out of Draco's mouth quickly, his own eyes going large with shock at what he'd said. Draco didn't know why that came out; he had just wanted Harry to stop talking. He didn't mean it, oh _Merlin_ he did NOT mean it! Harry was going to think that he meant it!

But now… how could he have said that! He was stupid, idiotic and now Harry was kissing him. Harry was kissing him? Draco's mind was sluggish and not seeming to be able process what was going on at the right speed, shock making him languid. Was he kissing back? Yes, yes he was. They were both kissing. Both kissing each other.

Harry smiled into the light seeping through the curtains of his bed. He felt so warm, so safe. Without opening his eyes, he turned and snuggled closer to Draco. Draco…oh.

Harry frowned. His head felt wet. That was odd. He opened his eyes. The pillow was red. Last night it was white. Harry laid there, dumbstruck, for a moment. Now how on earth had _that_ happened? What was even stranger was that the whole pillow wasn't red; parts of it were still white. Reaching for his glasses he examined it closer. Indeed, there were white patches. With a frown, he began to shake Draco, wanting to ask him if he'd spilt something on his pillow.

"Bugger." Harry cursed as Draco obstinately refused to wake up. He groaned and shoved Draco harder before giving up with a frustrated, "Idiot."

The curtains on Harry's bed were thrown back and Ron stood there, grinning like an idiot.

"What did you do?" Harry asked, fully expecting the inevitability that Ron had pulled some kind of prank. He frowned again as the smiled slowly slid from Ron's face.

"Merlin, Harry, your bed…" Some of the boys looked onto the scene, their faces pale and shocked. Oh _great_, and this had to happen now, when Draco wouldn't wake up. Bloody marvellous.

"Oh fuck!" Seamus looked away and covered his mouth.

"Get over it!" Harry glared at them, angry at their obvious and annoying homophobia. Harry kicked Draco harshly. "Wake up you stupid asshole." Draco jolted lifelessly. "Very funny, I know you're awake, you fuck." Sometimes, like now, Harry wished Draco wasn't the type of person who'd pretend they were asleep so that they didn't have to deal with a crowd of homophobic boys who had found him sleeping on the bed of another boy. It was only slightly annoying.

Ron made a choked noise in the back of his throat but Harry ignored him. "Wake up!" He pushed Draco, who fell off the bed into a lifeless heap. Draco was face down on the floor, the red stained back of his head facing upwards. Harry paled.

"That's juice. That's red juice." Ron reached for him. "Get the fuck away from me!" Harry screamed.

"Oh god, oh god, oh god…" Dean was repeating the words over and over again.

"Harry." Ron dove at Harry and captured him in his arms as Harry clawed, bit and kicked him.

"Get off of me!" he wailed. "He's not dead!"

"It's okay." Ron tried to soothe Harry.

"No it's fucking not! You're touching me! Draco's going to beat the fuck out of you when he wakes up!" Harry was screaming at the top of his lungs, babbling about anything and everything.

"Oh my god." Hermione's covered her mouth as she and the other girls entered the dormitory.

"Hermione, get the headmaster." Ron said, wincing as Harry hit him particularly hard. "Just fucking get someone!"

"No…" Harry sobbed into Ron's shoulders.

Within mere minutes Madam Pomfrey and Dumbledore were there, looking horrified and shocked. One for action, Pomfrey levitated the unmoving body out of the room.

With inhuman strength and just a little unfocused magic, Harry threw Ron off of him. He stumbled and fell at Dumbledore's feet.

"I'll do anything."

Dumbledore looked pained. "Harry, there's nothing you can do."

But Harry wasn't listening, Harry was still talking. "Please, just tell me what to do. Just tell me what to do and I'll do it.

"Harry-"

"I NEED HIM!" Harry down into sobs. "I ne-e-ed him… please… PLEASE!" he screamed once again, choking and coughing from the strain of yelling through sobs. Not that he cared. How could he care? Everything he'd cared about was on its way to the hospital wing. Soon it would be in the dirt. And then all he'd love was dirt. Until his dying day Harry Potter would be in love with dirt.

Harry took in a shuddering sigh before standing. He looked into Dumbledore's eyes.

"I'll do everything in my power." Dumbledore said, staring back at Harry, his eyes trying to send all the strength he had in his body to the boy. Harry nodded and sniffed before turning to follow Pomfrey and Draco's body; Draco's still body.

Dumbledore glanced at Ron and Hermione, who looked as though their lover was the one who had died.

"Harry…" Hermione mouthed.

Harry ran after Madam Pomfrey and his lover, his hair billowing in a boyish manner, and grabbed Draco's hand and squeezed it as he finally reached them. Pomfrey shot him a concern-filled look, but Harry was too pre-occupied with lacing his fingers with Draco's to notice. He was too busy thinking about how, out of all the people in the world, he was betting that he was one of the very, very few who had ever held Draco's hand. Draco didn't squeeze back. But Harry was too busy trying to make their hands clasp without their hands being in an awkward position to notice.

"I'm going to need you to back away now." She said as they entered the hospital wing and Draco was laid on a bed.

Harry edged against the wall as Madam Pomfrey began casting spells left and right. She was soon joined by Dumbledore who helped in any way possible. Harry just stood, completely separate from the entire ordeal, tears running down his face one by one.

Harry's hands clenched and unclenched, trying to remember how it felt to hold Draco's hand. He began to panic as the sensation didn't return as vividly as he wanted. What if he couldn't remember? What if he couldn't remember what it felt like to kiss Draco? He closed his eyes and berated himself for letting go, for ever letting go of Draco's hand. He should have held on, he should have known there was so little time left.

Harry opened his eyes and stared at Pomfrey and Dumbledore, working around Draco's still form. He should have made Draco tell him what was wrong. If he had pushed, he knew he could have made Draco tell him, he knew it. He knew it all along but he hadn't thought it a big deal he thought they could just talk about it the next day, he thought it would be alright. He was such an idiot. Harry saw Dumbledore and Madam Pomfrey exchange worried looks.

There was so much he should have done.

"I love you." He whispered. Pomfrey and Dumbledore were becoming frantic in their spells. "I know you love me too." He could almost feel it. Harry smiled through his tears as Pomfrey and Dumbledore stopped their efforts. He could almost feel Draco's hand in his. Pomfrey gave a worried look his way.

Harry flexed his hand again.


	9. 50

A/N: Okay, I suppose this was a little while coming (but what else is new). This is the unbeta-ed version because I was just excited to get it out there. I suppose people might be wondering about Draco and all that. I am now finished the story, this chapter isn't the last chapter (oh god no), I've just finished writing all the chapters after it. As such, I've merely got to look through them etc. before I put them up. The NC-17 scene can be found here: http://miniluv68. The chapter seven one is still not yet up. My apologies, I will have it up soon. Also, this was like a three-thousand word chapter and now it's not, so, I feel less accomplished and you should definitely read the omitted scene.

50

"He's alive," Pomfrey said. Harry let out a shaky sigh and buried his face in his hands. Dumbledore and Madam Pomfrey exchanged looks.

"We'll give you two some time." The two exited, leaving Harry with Draco. Harry didn't move. He stayed exactly the same for a long moment, his head hanging limply.

"You always have to make a big show of things, don't you?" Harry smiled slightly and lifted his head. He folded his arms and stared at Draco. "You better appreciate me; I've gone through a lot for you." Draco didn't move. Harry's smiled faded and he came to sit beside Draco, waiting for him to wake up. Waiting because he had to wake up; there was no if.

Harry sat, his head in his hands and his thoughts bleak, blank, and unwelcoming. He felt someone sit beside him and he did nothing, did not care to do anything. He felt Ron's hand on his back, knew it was Ron's because there was just something about one's best friend that is always recognizable, something that makes you always seem to know. And Harry didn't really want to know at the moment.

Harry realized that it had been quite awhile since he'd talked, really talked, to Ron, or Hermione, for that matter; he hadn't really cared to think about them for the last few days.

He still didn't care.

"Harry," Ron sounded like he was about to cry and Harry was confused, very, very confused by it. At least, he would be, if he cared about Ron or anything to do with him.

And Harry didn't care about Ron because Harry was sad and depressed and… angry, so very angry. Because none of this should happen, because he wanted none of this to happen.

Harry briefly wished he could go back, but he wasn't sure to where. Back to where he was happy, but again he wasn't sure where that was. He knew there was this thing that made him happy, knew there was something not very far away, but wasn't quite sure what to do or how to get there or what it was.

Harry was thinking this, surrounded by himself and _his _worries, when he felt strong arms suddenly grab him and hold him. Harry was shocked into the present.

"Ron!" He cried, for Ron did not hug him, and he didn't really hug Ron.

"I know you're upset and I know that nothing I say will make it better but please, please try to understand that it's going to be okay, no matter what happens. We've been in worse situations than this and we've always pulled through."

Harry wasn't sure why his eyes were starting to prick and why his arms felt like they should be hugging him back. "This doesn't have anything to do with _us_," he spat. "This has to do with me and Draco." Harry was ashamed when he heard a certain crack in his voice.

Harry expected Ron to be angry. Harry expected Ron to lash back, to be stubborn like he always was.

But Ron just hugged him.

From the other side of the room, Hermione watched, Pansy standing beside her. Hermione's eyes were red and her face was blotchy; there were still traces of tears on her cheeks and she still hadn't really stopped crying. It had never occurred to Harry to think why Hermione might be crying, because Hermione didn't care, she couldn't care about something like this.

And suddenly there was someone on the other side of him, and they were hugging him too, and he wanted to scream and tell everyone to get off of him, but at the same time, he didn't want them to let go.

Hermione let out a sob and buried her face against Harry, and Harry was sure that Ron was crying, though he hid it well and the only tell-tale sign was that Harry's shirt was starting to get soaked.

Pansy rolled her eyes and crossed her arms, staring at the blubbering trio. She stood there for a moment, just taking in the sight impatiently. "What the hell." She said, admitting defeat and throwing her arms around Harry.

Harry stayed still, not really sure what to do, for he didn't want them to stay and didn't want them to go. Eventually, he supposed the decision was made for him as he began to cry, sobs and heaving chest and all, for the confusion and the worry and everything was just too much to hold onto on his own, and in response his… friends… just wrapped their arms around him tighter, supporting him in is inability to stand on his own.

"I'm s-scared." Harry sobbed, his arms awkwardly trying to get a hold on each of them at the same time.

No one said anything. No one called him weak; no one chastised him for crying. They were merely there, comforting hulks of mass, quivering with tears of shared misery.

But, if you have ever paid attention to math, you will know that when something is divided between people, each has less than if they had all of that something. Therefore, really, Harry supposed it suddenly wasn't so bad.

Harry had sent them all to bed, sure that just because he was going to spend the night outside the hospital wing (Madam Pomfrey had locked him out, saying that Draco needed rest without distractions), didn't mean that they had to. So they left, and came back ten minutes later with pillows and blankets, and they made a bed on the floor.

Ron had been a little bit uneasy with Pansy and Hermione sleeping next to each other and had tried to sneak in between them a few times without much success.

Harry hadn't slept that well in a long time.

Of course, come morning, they really did leave, knowing that Harry needed _some_ time alone with Draco (Harry was now allowed to see him). And so, Harry sat, next to his lovers bed, and waited, waited like he had waited the day before and all night, for Draco to wake up.

Draco twitched. He made a low moan as he felt the pain in his head. Harry lifted his head from the spot on Draco's chest where it had been lying. Harry blinked sleepily, still not fully awake. Then, Harry's eyes fell on Draco's face.

"Oh god," Harry sobbed; his arms attacked Draco and encircled him as Harry's body trembled and tears stained Draco's clothes.

Draco was paralyzed for a moment, unable to do anything. Lightly pressing his arm onto Harry's back, Draco's breath hitched slightly. Harry's sobs got louder as he slowly began coming out of shock, and he tightened his hold on Draco. And they cried; together.

Harry stroked Draco's cheek and snuggled in closer. Draco's eyes were closed, but he wasn't sleeping. Harry's eyes were still red from crying.

"Why didn't you get help?" Harry whispered, his hand moving to Draco's jaw. "You knew you were hurt."

Draco squeezed his eyes and wished he wouldn't have to answer. "I don't know." Harry let it sit at that.

Harry turned to the neck very close to his and kissed it. His lips lingered there for a moment before trailing up Draco's jaw and onto his face, leaving slow kisses the whole way. He hesitated a moment before laying a kiss on the top of Draco's head.

Harry's hands came to the sides of Draco's face and he rested his forehead on Draco's, their noses touching.

"Draco." Harry said, his thumbs tracing patterns on Draco's cheeks. "Draco, look at me."

Draco's face screwed up. "No." He sobbed, his voice going up several octaves.

"Draco, its okay." Harry laughed softly.

"No, no its not. I… I don't want this, Harry; I don't want something like this."

"Something like what?" Harry said slowly, dreading the answer.

"Something where we have to deal with losing the other person!" Draco's eyes were open and watering now, his control beginning to fall away.

Harry closed his eyes. "I can't change that, Draco. This is a war; there are casualties and I…" Harry broke off for a moment, gathering himself. "I have a responsibility."

"To who? Who do you have a responsibility to?"

Harry opened his eyes and said it without a single ounce of doubt in his voice. "To everyone."

Draco looked away. "I have a responsibility too."

Harry knotted his eyebrows. "Yeah, but, you don't really believe in that, right? I mean, you're practically on our side, aren't you?"

"When have I ever said that?!" Draco was sitting now, his glare deep and hateful and aimed at Harry. He no longer felt tired.

Harry shook his head and tried desperately to think. "You didn't bu-"

"You just assume that I've gone to your side."

"No, I-" Harry had assumed it, though, hadn't he?

"I barely even know you!" Draco screamed, a final and grand crescendo that left nothing but the downward fall. "We've been together…" Draco looked at some distant place as though he himself didn't really believe it, that he had to think about it before actually remembering. "Twice." Draco looked sad and distant as Harry's face and heart became pained. "We've been together twice." Draco laughed dryly. "That's it."

Draco's eyes scrunched up. "It seems longer." Draco whispered before looking up at Harry again. "I don't really know you, Harry. You're here, crying, yet there's not really anything between us." Draco thought for a moment. "Maybe you're just looking for love. I don't blame you, not when you're against you-know-who all alone." Draco kept on, like the thread of thought he held on to might slip away. "But that's the thing, Harry, you are alone." Harry's pain turned to horror. "It's just you; you're the only one in this. I don't really feel anything, not like that, anyways, not something of that magnitude." Draco's voice became severe and harsh. "And I don't think you do either."

"But…" Harry struggled, open mouthed. "But you came, you came to me, when you were hurt, you…" Harry stumbled, trying to somehow make everything Draco was saying wrong.

"Harry, I had a head wound, I was confused. I just went to the last person I could remember seeing, and that was you."

"But it means something! It has to mean something!" Harry's eyes were pained and wet, full of tears he couldn't acknowledge: he was too busy being scared. Harry tried to grab Draco's hand, but Draco moved away.

"No, it doesn't." Harry stared disbelievingly as Draco looked at him with cold, heartless eyes. "I'm sorry," There was no emotion behind the words, they fell flat, lifeless onto the floor, but Harry was on his knees gathering them up because he was so desperate for something to hold onto.

Draco slid off the bed and walked away, leaving Harry to stare disbelievingly ahead.

"You're just scared!" Within moments Harry had leapt from the bed and was grasping Draco with white-knuckled hands. "You're just scared of this, of having this." Harry's hands had come up to encircle Draco's face. "But that's okay, 'cause I'm scared too. But," Harry paused slightly. "We can do it together, we can brave anything, as long as we're together." Harry smiled momentarily.

"I am scared." Draco whispered. "I'm scared of you!" There was a shocked silence that followed his echoing scream. "Up until a few days ago we were enemies and now you're telling me we can do anything together?! Do you have nay idea how stupid you sound?!" Draco's face was red from spitting the words at Harry.

There was a long moment where all was silent. Then, with twin-like unison, the boys attacked one another; only, they weren't fighting, not exactly. Harry locked his mouth onto Draco's as he was thrown onto the floor. Harry arched and moaned low in his throat.

"We really need to find a new place to get on top of each other; this is starting to get old." Harry said with a grin as Draco proceeded to help strip Harry of his shirt.

"Eh, s'not that bad." Draco said as he threw it to the side. He grinned and pulled Harry in for another kiss as he undid the button on Harry's pants. Soon they too were lying in an obscure corner of the room. Next, Draco turned his attention to slightly wet boxers that Harry was wearing.

Harry wiggled impatiently.

Draco cocked an eyebrow. "Something the matter?" He asked with a cheeky grin. Harry scowled.

"I don't like the fact that you're still fully dressed."

"Oh." Draco nodded like he understood perfectly, all the while cocking an eyebrow.

Draco pulled back slightly and looked down at Harry, grinning like a madman, albeit a tired, breathless one. Nonetheless, Harry was rewarded with the thought that, perhaps, Draco felt so much more strongly than he let on, and Draco was rewarded with the sight of Harry looking completely mussed, a sight that was always welcome.

"I love you." Harry said with a smile.

Draco snuggled down closer, nuzzling Harry's neck. "What was that?" he murmured as he pressed a kiss into Harry's skin.

"I said," Harry adopted a fake exasperated tone. "I love you."

Draco smiled. "I think you're going to have to say it again."

Harry rolled his eyes and sighed. "I love you," He said again, pretending to be annoyed but really, he could have said it a million times and never feel tired of the words bouncing off his lips. And really, the last thing Draco wanted was for Harry to stop saying it.

Draco grinned and wrapped his arms around Harry's neck. "You're going to have to say it at least fifty times."

Harry laughed and gave Draco a quick kiss. "Why fifty times?"

"Because," Draco said, twirling a piece of Harry's unruly hair. "People have to hear things fifty times before they can memorize and really know it." Draco stopped and bit his lip, almost nervous at what Harry would say to that, hoping he hadn't crossed the line. Harry had never seen anything more beautiful.

Harry stayed still for a moment, knowing full well that Draco was just about dying with nervousness. Harry leant down slightly, just before Draco's lips. He flicked his eyes up to Draco's. "I love you."

And Draco laughed and swatted him. "Harry!" He said in protest. Harry grinned and kissed Draco's neck, repeating the word over, and over again.

"I love you!" he said, nipping at Draco's neck. "I love you, I love you, Oh, how many is that now? Hmm… I love you, schnookums!" –That rewarded him with another playful swat from Draco- "I love you." Harry stopped and turned serious, leaning closer to Draco and kissing his nose. He rested his entire body weight onto Draco and held Draco's face in his hands. "I love you." He said, completely serious this time.

Draco smiled. "I love you too."


	10. For You

_I used to be a little boy__So__ old in my shoes__And what __i__ choose is my choice__What's a boy supposed to do?__The killer in me is the killer in you__My__ love__I send this smile over to you_

------Draco stared at the ceiling. He could feel Harry beside him, feel his deep, steady breathing, and Draco couldn't help but feel the slow creeping panic begin to seep through his bones. This was not the way things were supposed to happen.

He knew Harry was going to die, knew it with a deep and burning passion, and, with as much passion as he held for knowing Harry was going to die, Draco knew that he also was going to die. It was only a matter of a very short time.

Draco closed his eyes. He didn't want to die. He didn't want Harry to die; he had nothing real against him. But, -Draco squeezed his eyes tighter, hoping somehow that maybe that would block out everything else- what could he do?

He was scared.

He didn't know what to do.

He didn't have any other options. -------

"Draco?" Snape looked up from his desk, his eyebrows pulled together in confusion and concern. "What's wrong?"

Draco walked over to Snape's desk, a frown placed on his face at the way Snape had chosen to address him. "Nothing, I'm quite fine. In fact, I have a plan."

Snape pushed back from his desk and looked at Draco seriously. "Are you sure? Perhaps there is something else-"

"No!" Draco laughed nervously as Snape's eyebrow knitted still farther at Draco's sudden outburst. "I… want this." Draco said, nodding his head. Draco meant to breathe in but it turned into a sob instead. He scrunched up his eyes and shook his head. "I'm sorry," he wiped the tears from his eyes and smiled, looking right at Snape. "I don't know what's gotten into me."

Draco frowned, then continued. "I've never felt this weak. It's almost like I care." Snape sent him a look that Draco received with a glare. "I'm not bothered by the fact that he's the one who's going to die, don't take this as pity for him. I've never killed; this is merely a thing that I'm going through because I've never been responsible for someone else's death.

"I don't want you to misunderstand. There are no feelings that I have for him that I couldn't squash within seconds; they're merely feelings for him as a human being. I've just never killed anyone. I accept that as hard. I accept it, therefore I am over it.

"I'm sorry for breaking down like this, Severus, but, there are just some times when even I have moments of… weakness, I suppose," Draco smiled briefly before his eyes went steely. The very, very scary thing about that entire speech was that, as strange as it was, Snape was beginning to find that he believed him, which wasn't possible.

"Draco…"

"Don't." Draco said, abruptly and seriously. "The last thing I need is your pity or your understanding because there's nothing to pity; there's nothing to understand." He glared angrily. "So stop looking at me like that," Draco's breathing was even, it seemed like he was barely taking notice of this. For once Snape almost felt like he was simply some misbehaving henchman that Draco was dealing with.

Draco seemed calm but Snape was sure there was something very strange and wild beneath the surface. There had to be. Draco… Draco couldn't be like this, could he? He was starting to wonder if the boy he… loved (?), was gone.

"Draco, calm down; this is noth-"

"I AM CALM!" Draco's hands slammed down onto the desk with an ear-slitting smack that echoed through the silent room.

"I am calm." Draco said slowly. "However, I am tired of everyone questioning whether I can do my job." There was a long pause in which Draco's icy eyes became very harsh. "You know what I think?" He stared into his professor's eyes. "I think you're jealous that the Dark Lord asked ME to do this; that he asked me to do this important thing. I bet you're hoping for me to fail so that any second you can pick up the job and finish it 'properly'."

Snape's heart almost broke. "Draco…"

"Stop it!" Draco cried, his hands coming to tangle in his own hair. His voice became soft as he whispered, "Stop acting like something bad is going to happen to me. There's nothing wrong!" Snape stared at him with solemn eyes for a long time.

"I don't love him," Draco said. He covered his face and struggled with the absolute and total frustration he felt with trying to convince Snape of how he felt, how he really felt.

"And so you don't," Snape said unemotionally. Draco looked up, confused.

"But…"

"Draco, I'm a Death Eater. You know I'm a Death Eater. I want Harry Potter dead and I'll do anything to make sure just that is achieved." Snape leaned forward in his desk. "If you don't kill him, I will. I'll do everything in my power to see that the Dark Lord gets what he wants, including pushing you out of the way… including killing you. I will do _anything _to see Harry Potter dead." He paused for a moment, leaning back in his chair. "My only question, Draco, is: do you want to do that? Do you want to have that hanging over your head?"

Draco stared at the floor in silence for a long time. "What time do you want to do it?" He said without a quiver of emotion in his voice.

"Are you sure-"

"What time," Draco's voice became firmer. "Do you want to do this?"

Snape nodded. "As you wish, then."

"What is it, Professor?" Harry asked as he walked into Dumbledore's office.

Dumbledore smiled warmly. "Ah, Harry." He pointed at a chair across from his desk. "Have a seat." Harry smiled as he sat down. Dumbledore let out a small sigh before getting down to business. "Harry, our main objective is to destroy Voldemort."

"I'm quite aware of that, professor."

Dumbledore's eyes twinkled as his smile grew. "I thought you might, but one never knows." Harry laughed. "Anyway, we…" Dumbledore paused, before leaning forward. "Harry, I think this may be it." Harry's breath caught in his throat.

"What do you mean?" He asked.

"We know where Voldemort is, and, Harry, I believe it's time to end this." Dumbledore looked at him with concern as Harry stared at the floor in a baffled manner. Dumbledore sat back and let Harry process everything.

"After all this time, I just, I can't imagine it finally ending." He looked up at Dumbledore. "It'd be a lie to say I'd miss him, but…" Harry thought for a moment. "It's just been such a big part of my life, to see it end, it's almost sad." He smiled.

"Are you ready, Harry?"

Harry laughed. "I'm scared as hell, but… I guess I'm as ready as I'll ever be."

Dumbledore smiled. "That's good."

"When are we leaving?"

"Tomorrow morning." Harry nodded and said nothing, even though it seemed a little soon.

"Okay." He said with a grin. For some odd reason, he was almost excited. Not because he was about to fight Voldemort, no, that scared him to the core; he was excited because, well, the only thing he could seem to do was think about what would happen a_fter _the battle, particularly the part that had to do with him and Draco.

Dumbledore and Harry talked over the particulars, going over this and that. Harry paid attention, not wanting to miss anything important, but, even still, his mind was somewhere else.

Harry smiled to himself as he was walking out of Dumbledore's office. He knew he should be dreading this, or he should be thinking thoughts along the lines of "I can't wait to murder that evil bastard", but he couldn't. He had been feeling too good about things lately. Besides, it was so hard to imagine something bad happening to him when there was someone like Draco who loved him. He just couldn't see it. Draco would protect him no matter what. Inside, of course, Harry knew that wasn't true, people died all the time, good people who had lovers and spouses, and yet, death seemed so very, very far away at the moment.

Yet, Harry knew those feelings weren't going to last very long. As soon as he was away from… all this, he was going to feel it. Somehow, though, he didn't really. He would be happy for now, he could give himself that.

------Draco feels the weight of Harry's hand curling around his wrist and distantly thinks just how nice it feels. He hears Harry whisper something in his ear, something to do with tomorrow night, and the forest. Draco doesn't smile as he looks into Harry's face. Merely brushes the back of his hand against Harry's cheek and nods. ------

Draco stared up at the clear sky. He could see twinkling high up. He wondered what it would be like to be up there too, to be twinkling all the time. Oh, he would give anything to twinkle; instead of being so down in the dirt like he was. He wished he could be clean and good and hopeful, something nice, and great. He wished he could be something so much more; so much more than the son of a Death Eater, so much more than just the lover of the-boy-who-lived.

He wanted… he wanted to be like Dumbledore… or Snape…or…Harry. They all… they all had something, something that made them special. They were all doing something, something important. And not only that, they believed in what they were doing, they had beliefs. The only thing Draco believed in was…well…he didn't really believe in anything anymore, anything other than the fact that he'd almost never be able to be what they were.

Draco wanted to be special.

They had hope. And, Harry… Harry was so full of hope. Draco… Draco had been taught not to hope… taught by experience and from looking at others. Maybe, and this was just a silly thought coming from a silly, naïve boy, maybe Harry could give him some of his hope. Just to borrow, Draco would just borrow his hope, just for a little while. Maybe then, maybe he would be able to hope that Harry would win the battle; that Harry would defeat Voldemort; that Harry…would live.

Draco hugged his knees and looked up at the sky. Maybe… maybe it was possible. If… if the stars could twinkle, maybe, with Harry's help, maybe he could twinkle. Maybe he could shine, maybe… maybe he could be good, nice, clean. Maybe for once he could believe. He wondered if Harry believed in him, Draco, or if he didn't really think about him.

Maybe Harry didn't think about things the way Draco did. He shook his head. That didn't matter, that didn't matter at all. Draco smiled at the twinkling stars and thought, anything… they always say anything is possible, so, maybe, just maybe, if everyone says it, it could be true.

Harry was making a huge amount of racket as he fought his way through the brush, not really caring if he were attacked by a werewolf at that moment; he was more concerned with killing every tree in the world. Starting with the Whomping Willow. With a ferocious cry, he swatted at a branch, which promptly flew back and hit him in the face. Harry stopped and sighed. He fell to the ground and sat, leaning against the tree closest to him.

"I'm sorry for saying trees were annoying." He said, looking up towards the tops of the forest, where branches of trees crisscrossed in a thick maze that almost blocked out the sky. A pinecone fell and hit Harry in the forehead. With another heavy sigh, he looked forwards, not even bothering to apologise again.

Harry buried his face in his hands, his frustration finally getting the best of him. He felt a hotness stinging in his eyes and, if he were truthful to himself, he would say it had nothing to do with the trees.

"What am I going to do…?" He whispered into his hands. "I don't feel like I should, I don't… I don't feel ready." He took in a shuddering breath. "I don't feel like an adult, not really, not when it comes to this." He let out a bitter laugh. "I mean, what have I really got to fight with? A scar? How am I supposed to kill someone that powerful? I… I've never killed anyone." He sniffed. "I don't want to kill anyone, I don't want to. I just _don't want to_. I'm not ready. I can't handle it."

He heard a soft plop and looked over to the side. He saw a pinecone nestled on the soft leaves and grass scattered on the ground beside him. Harry laughed and looked up once again. "Peace offering?" He asked and grinned when another pinecone fell on his other side. "I suppose my horribly sad and pitiful story does that to people; they feel sorry for me." Harry sighed. "I don't want anyone to feel sorry for me; I just want…." He laughed sharply and wiped his eye with the heel of his hand. "I have no idea what I want."

He laughed again, bitterly. "And I'm talking to a tree." Said tree ruffled its branches in protest. "Sorry." Harry said.

He sat there for a moment, thinking. Turning around Harry stared at the tree trunk right in front of him. He ran his fingers over the rough bark.

"You're beautiful, you know." He whispered. "You're so stable, so strong, and yet, there are parts of you, that are so, so frail. Parts of you that can break, so, so easily." Harry stopped moving his hands and looked up. "I believe… I know. I know that I have to do this. I know, yet, still… I wonder. I just wonder what would happen if I didn't." Harry let out a swift breath of air and blinked back tears. His voice raised a few decibels as he spoke again. "Does that make me a bad person?"

He sniffed heavily and wiped his nose with the back of his sleeve. "I don't want to be a bad person, everyone says I'm not, but…" he scrunched up his face. "There's so much of him inside of me. It's hard to tell sometimes. It's hard to tell if it's me or if it's him."

He opened his eyes and stared with affectionate eyes. "I want someone else, someone else I can be complete with. Someone who makes me so completely sure of who I am; who makes me sure it's still me. You know?" He looked up and smiled before turning around and resting his back against the tree trunk again.

"I think," he whispered. "He might be that person." Harry closed his eyes and relaxed. "He feels so familiar, so safe. It's like I've been there a million times and each time it's awesome and each time its been the same and it will never, ever change." His voice was tainted with un-spilled tears. "He makes me feel like I won't have to go to that place ever again." His voice rose an octave. "That place where all my nightmares are, where Voldemort is; he makes me feel like it all just goes away, or, like it's there," he said thoughtfully. "But it doesn't matter, not anymore, not with him."

He opened his eyes and smiled. "He denies it, but, sometimes, when I look into his eyes I see so much love I think I'm going to burst. I look into his eyes and I know, I _know_everything's going to be alright." He swallowed. "Because he loves me." Harry smiled again and closed his eyes, relaxing into the tree for a moment.

Draco closed his eyes and let go of his knees, falling onto his back and letting his legs straighten out. He adjusted so that he was lying, spread-eagle, on the grass. His arms and legs were sticking out and, he laughed, because it felt so wonderful to give into such abandonment. He closed his eyes and took in a deep breath, letting it out in a staggering rush. He felt the need to crawl into a ball but wouldn't let himself, wouldn't let himself hide, wouldn't let himself withdraw. Because this actually felt good. It might not have been as safe as the other choice, but, it felt good.

He beat his hand against the ground and let out a savage cry, beating out his frustrations on something other than himself. There was no reason for hating himself… besides the obvious, of course. Draco forced himself to relax again, let his clenched muscles become at ease. He took in another deep, shaky breath.

It would be okay, he told himself. Everything… everything would be perfectly okay. He took in another deep breath.

Harry crept through the brush as quietly as he could, far, far into the very deep centre of the Forbidden Forest. Harry pried apart the branches of the last few trees and found himself in the clearing. The moon gave a blue, incandescent glow to the normally green grass that covered the ground. He looked up and saw Draco lying at the very top of the hill in the middle of the clearing. Harry felt a very real, genuine smile spread out across his face. Harry closed his eyes and took in a deep breath, giving himself a moment to make sure his smile wouldn't slide off, and then laughed silently at his cynicism.

Draco was still breathing deeply, intent on soaking up all of the wonderfully fresh air. He felt, more than he heard, Harry fall softly beside him. They both lay like that for a long moment, just simply lying there, before Draco opened his eyes. Both boys stared up at the starry sky, quite involved in their thoughts, their positions similar in a wonton, limbs thrown about way.

It was comfortably silent and Draco soon found himself with his eyes closed and his breathing easy, finally finding the peace he had been desperate to find. He didn't really think about it at the time, but it might have had something to do with Harry's presence.

Harry looked over at Draco's sleeping form and smiled slightly. He looked back up at the sky and stayed that way for a moment, but felt a slight nudging within him. He tried to ignore it, but the need seemed to just grow beyond his control.

Harry looked over at Draco once again and tried to remember ever seeing the boy relaxed like he was then. It was quite a sight, Draco bathed in moonlight; Harry almost laughed at that, bathed in moonlight. Yet, he supposed, Draco was, bathed in moonlight. Moonlight was washing him clean and leaving him a glowing bundle, like a newborn, all clean and…shiny.

Harry moved his hand and slowly traced a line down the pale face. If he didn't come ba-… Harry shook his head. Harry just wanted to look at Draco, just wanted to see him, just for as long as he could. He wouldn't be stupid this time, he wouldn't be wasteful, he would memorize every curve and bump of Draco's body, and he would memorize it well. There was nothing that could keep him away from it.

Setting himself on his side, Harry rested his head on his hands, much like the fake sleeping position you see so often. He wondered, at this moment, if Draco would be upset if Harry touched him.

He wondered if Draco would be upset if he woke up and Harry was gazing lovingly into his eyes. Because that was what Harry wanted to do. He wanted to just touch Draco. He wanted to see Draco naked. Not for any sexual reasons, he just wanted to see Draco bare, he wanted to see _Draco. _After all, clothes are just shields and he wanted to see what Draco looked like, he wanted to map Draco with his hands.

But… maybe, maybe he'd let Draco sleep for awhile. He hadn't realized it before, but he was actually quite tired himself. Harry wasn't sure if it was a physical tired or an emotional tired but, nonetheless, it was draining.

Slowly, and with curious glances Draco's way, Harry slowly settled himself partially over Draco's body, his head resting on Draco's chest. Harry smiled as he felt the steady beat of up and down of (his) Draco's breathing. Harry's smile widened. Up, Draco's chest would go, and then down. Always so even, always so deep and peaceful. Harry's muscles went slack and he felt his eyes starting to drift close.

Then, the strangest thing happened. He felt Draco lift his arm and place it on Harry's back. Harry's eyes flew open and he looked at Draco's face, which, much to his shock and horror, had a slight smile plastered on it.

"You were awake, this whole time?" Harry asked, disbelief apparent in his voice.

Draco's sleepy grin widened slightly as he stroked Harry's hair. "Of course I was." He laughed as Harry lifted his head. "Go to sleep," Draco whispered.

But Harry didn't want to go to sleep, not anymore. He laid his head back down but didn't close his eyes, though Draco's breathing was still even and he had obviously declared himself ready for sleep.

"You know I love you, right?" Harry said suddenly.

There was a short silence. "Yes, for heavens' sake you've only said it about a million times."

Harry smiled shortly. "So you know that no matter what-"

Draco sat up suddenly and looked quite pissed off. "What the hell are you going on about, Harry? Honestly, you'd think one could never get to sleep."

Harry sighed, he wondered if he should be taken back by Draco's reaction, but found the he just put it down to normal, strange Draco behaviour.

"I just… I don't know." Harry looked around, trying to think about what it was exactly he wanted to say. "I just… I just want to make sure you know, because… because sometimes it seems like you don't believe it." Draco was purposely looking away as Harry's eyes drilled holes into his skull, drying to drill the words into Draco. There was a moment of silence.

"Right," Draco said, turning away and lying on his side.

Harry hadn't entirely expected that. He had expected Draco to be angry, and to maybe be a little abrupt but, really, he guessed maybe he'd almost hoped against hope that Draco would… receive the compliment? Smile? Harry almost sighed; he didn't know why he tried, not when Draco was such a stubborn asshole.

"I realize this isn't easy for you, Draco." Harry mashed his teeth together. "But it's not easy for me either, why the hell do you have to be such a prick about everyth-"

"Because I am a prick!" Draco whirled around suddenly, sitting up. "Harry." Draco said his name in a mocking tone. "You can't change me," Draco's eyes stared into Harry for a moment before he turned and laid down once again, his back to Harry.

Harry couldn't see it, but Draco's eyes were scrunched up in an effort to hold back tears.

He stared at Draco's back for a moment, not really thinking, before resigning himself and lying down, next to Draco. He draped an arm over Draco's body and felt him go stiff.

"I really would rather if we slept a little bit more separately," Draco whispered. Harry was motionless for a moment before slowly removing his arm and lying on his back. He stared at the stars up above and swallowed loudly.

Draco repeated a slow mantra in his head, _don't touch me, don't touch me, don't touch me, don't touch me, oh god please don't hate me, don't touch me… _his eyes and body firmly closed, trying so hard to stop the unwanted thoughts running through his head.

Harry tried very, very hard not to cry. So hard that it made the fact even sadder. His chest rose and fell in an unsteady, wheezing pattern as Harry bravely tried to hide his sobs. Because, he was brave, that was just who he was, he was the type of someone who'd fight a battle… alone.

Even if he didn't want to.

Even if it was the very, very last thing he'd want to do.

Even if it would kill him.

Even if he knew it would kill him.

-------------Draco looked over at Harry and snuggled in closer to him, kissing his cheek thoughtfully. Then Draco turned away, because he didn't really want to look at Harry while he thought about this. This, very, very horrible thing.

Draco didn't want to see Harry die. And, he knew, _knew_ that Harry didn't want to see him die. Maybe Draco could do one good thing in his life.

Draco was sure that the Dark Lord was going to kill him. He had shown himself unworthy and undedicated. Even if he did what he was supposed to he knew, he just _knew_, that he was dead. But first, Draco would have to watch Harry die.

And if he didn't, if he didn't do what he was supposed to do… then Harry would know and have to watch Draco die.

Draco felt something wet on his cheek but put it off to something dripping from the ceiling. Maybe it would be easier if Harry died knowing that Draco had betrayed him. Maybe then Harry wouldn't feel any guilt, as Harry was wont to do.

Draco was willing to break himself for that.

Because this was going to break him.

It seemed funny to be plotting Harry's death as he laid, naked, in his arms. Funny, just hilarious. -------------

A/N: This story is headed for some angsty waters… This was like a super long chapter. Lyrics are from Disarm by The Smashing Pumpkins.


	11. Memento

A/N: Chapter Eleven, since it is primarily sex, is posted here: http://miniluv68. I cannot stress enough how strongly I feel that you should read this. It's a very important chapter, is quite long, and holds a very significant flow for the story. It's also very sweet and nice.

SuddenlyI'm not half the man I used to beThere's a shadow hanging over meOh, yesterdayCame suddenly

YesterdayLove was such an easy game to playNow I need a place to hide awayOh, I believeIn yesterday

The sun was still hidden from the world, when Draco opened his eyes. He smiled groggily, not scared, despite the lack of light around him. That is, before coming to the realization that he was alone. Sitting up in panic, he looked around him and saw: his clothes. That was it. An empty hilltop and, his clothes. No Harry.

Draco closed his eyes and threw his head back against the ground. He had forgotten what today was. Perhaps, he had thought, maybe, if he didn't think about it, it would just go away. But, it hadn't; it was still going to happen.

The darkness seemed to swirl around him, dark shadows swooping down and around him. He missed the light that the stars had given, late in the night. Now they were gone.

Draco slowly opened his eyes and got up, grabbing his clothes and slipping them on, one by one, taking his time the whole way through.

With an apathetic glance behind him, Draco made his way down the hill and through the forest. It was a very green day, and by the time he reached the edge of the forest there were flecks of gold reaching through the branches overhead.

As he broke through the overbearing trees, he sighed, as the hot sun warmed him all over. Then, he walked silently over the grass, noticing students flocking around the grounds, and he exchanged glances with a few Slytherins.

He reached the castle, stepped in, and, not knowing where Harry was, he soon began wandering the halls, searching for him. He was walking around aimlessly, when he saw Harry come out from behind a stone gargoyle.

Harry smiled when he saw him and rushed over to place a kiss on Draco's lips.

"Harry!" Draco cried, pushing him away and looking around the hall nervously. "You can't do that someone will-" But Harry just grinned and kissed him again. Thank god, Draco was thinking, there was no one in that hallway.

Harry pulled away, still grinning, and grabbed Draco's hand. "When I get back, I want to tell everyone."

"Harry! What? No, yo-"

"I don't care anymore." Harry said happily. "It doesn't matter what they think." He pecked Draco on the cheek and smiled happily. It was infectious, Draco smiled too, though only slightly, as he was trying to hold it back. "Besides, if they really care for me, they'll support this, and," Harry shrugged. "If they don't, oh well."

Harry wrapped his arms around Draco and pulled him in for another quick kiss, it was bittersweet as Harry was soon pulling back. "I have to go," he said.

Draco nodded. "Bye." He said, still smiling. Harry smiled back, muttered a farewell, then started to move away.

Draco stared at where Harry had been for a long time.

He closed his eyes and tried to calm himself as his breath began to get faster and hitch. His world continued to swirl as he was left with the image of Harry walking away, imprinted upon his mind. He wiped his eyes, took a very deep breath, then took off after Harry.

Harry was just about to turn the corner and exit the hallway, when Draco caught up to him.

"H-Harry…" Draco grabbed his sleeve. Harry looked at him with concerned eyes, taking in Draco's suddenly red eyes.

"What's wrong?"

Draco laughed and wiped his face with the back of his sleeve. "Oh, umm… I just, I wanted to say, goodbye," he nodded.

Harry smiled. "Draco," he shook his head lovingly. "It's going to be fine."

Draco nodded with a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. "I know." He took a step forward and pushed back a small piece of Harry's hair.

"I love you." Harry said grinning. Draco nodded. Harry sighed exasperatedly. "I love you fifty times over."

Draco laughed and bit his lip, his eyes just slightly glassy. "Maybe…" he glanced at the floor before looking back up with into Harry's eyes, a shaky sigh escaping him. "Maybe you shouldn't go." There was a slight tremor to his voice.

Harry laughed. "Draco, I have to go," he looked like he was telling a disobedient child something for the fiftieth time. Draco hated it, but… liked it, too. It carried a sort of, familiar warmth to it. Draco didn't get a lot of warmth in his life. He found himself transfixed with Harry's eyes, unable to look away.

"Why?" He whispered.

Harry laughed again. "Because there are millions of people waiting for me to save them," This was what he wanted, this was how it was supposed to be, everything was going according to plan; this, this was what he wanted. Draco wanted this.

"But…" Draco smiled. "I-" Draco's voice broke off. "I need you-" He fought down a few ferocious sobs that tried to force their way up, and laughed. "To save me."

Harry's face turned slightly concerned. But only slightly, he had no real reason to be worried about things with Draco. "You know I'm going to be fine, don't you?"

"Yeah. Yeah…" Draco tipped his head up, trying not to let any tears fall. "Look." He whispered. Harry looked up at the ceiling and grinned at the fact there really wasn't anything to look at at all. Draco let out a short laugh. "They're so beautiful, aren't they? They're like glowing sceptres of hope, fighting for righteousness." Harry laughed again, but Draco's mouth never twitched; he didn't think it was funny. "Did you know that every star dies, Harry?"

Harry's smile faded and he brought his head down and looked at Draco, who continued. "They last for a long time, but eventually, they explode." Draco laughed. "I bet you never knew that, huh?" Draco smiled and stared up into the stone that was between them and the heavens. "They seem so… strong, so perfect, yet, in a way, they're also human." Draco looked back at Harry, lowering his head.

There was a long silence, as Harry stared, slightly confused, at his lover. A tear slipped down Draco's cheek, but he didn't seem to notice. "Please…" Draco pulled away from Harry as he tried grabbing Draco in some sort of comforting grasp. And here Draco acted upon something that had been burning inside him, something that he'd been to afraid to voice. "Die with me." Draco's voice was high, but he didn't really care, didn't really care about the blinding tears that burned in his eyes. "Don't die up there, with a huge bang, just, stay here, with me."

Draco sobbed and Harry's eyes were large and wide with incomprehension. Draco was starting to scare him. "There's so much we can do, Harry." Draco grabbed Harry's hands very suddenly and looked into his eyes. "We can go anywhere, everywhere." Harry opened his mouth to speak but then closed it, not really sure what to say, what to think. "I can do anything you want; be anyone you want." Draco was grasping Harry's arm hard enough to bruise but neither of them seemed to really notice that.

Draco placed a kiss on Harry lips. "Die with me," he said, and Harry smiled and laughed. So this was what Draco was like when he was sincere. He had a flair for drama, Harry had to admit.

"Of course, I think I've made it pretty obvious how I felt about that," Draco smiled hopefully and wiped away his tears as Harry grinned at him.

"Really?" Draco asked, disbelieving yet hoping and wanting and believing all at the same time.

"Yes." And he pulled Draco into a tight hug. Draco giggled and tightened his hold on Harry, closing his eyes and breathing in Harry's scent, glad for the first time in how long. "Just as soon as I get back," Draco went rigid. He pulled away quickly.

"No, you said-"

"Draco," Harry looked at him consolingly. "I'm not going to die."

"But what if you do?" Draco whispered.

Harry's eyes turned apologetic. "I can't not go. "

"Yes, yes you can. It's quite easy, in fact."

Harry sighed. "No, Draco-"

"Yes!" Draco screamed. "Yes it is and you just don't care enough not to!" Harry looked at him in silence, his brows knotted together. "What the fuck is wrong with you, Harry? Do you want to do this? Do you want to leave me?!"

"Yes!" Harry screamed back at him, pushing Draco away. "I want to kill the man who murdered my parents and tortured hundreds of people; yes I want to do that. And if that means leaving you for a few hours, I'm sorry, Draco, but yeah, I still want to." Draco nodded, his eyes frozen in place, where they stared right into Harry's.

"Okay," Draco said quietly, and he swallowed, making sure his throat still worked.

Harry's eyes looked concerned. "Okay?" He asked, and Draco nodded. Harry sighed and brought his hands up to hold Draco's face. "Is there something wrong?" Draco shook his head again. "You're going to be okay?"

Draco smiled, but the smile didn't quite reach his eyes. "Of course, Harry. I'll see you when you get back."

Harry grinned, quite blinded by his own hopes and nerves. "And then we can die together, right?" Draco laughed briskly and nodded.

Harry nodded and turned to leave. Draco watched him go with empty eyes. Empty eyes because everything that had been in his eyes was now trailing down his cheeks. Draco stared at the floor trying to ignore reality.

Draco brought up his hands and held them against his eyes for a moment. Then he wiped away all of the tears and reached forward, stumbling slightly as it was just out of his reach. Harry looked back in confusion at the hand clasped tightly around his arm.

Draco looked up at him with shining eyes for a moment, before silently shuffling so that he was right in front of Harry. Draco brushed a stray hair from Harry's face. Then, he smiled and leaned forward, kissing Harry as passionately as he knew how. Harry, though he was still slightly confused, wrapped his arms around Draco tightly, but not as tightly as Draco himself, who crushed Harry against his chest, digging his tongue into the other boy's mouth.

He pulled away and Harry looked at him through hooded eyes, adorable in his slight confusion and bruised lips. Draco smiled and memorized every little bit of that face, every feeling of the kiss, the warmth of Harry's body against his, and he stored it, in the far recesses of his mind so that he could hold it forever, so no matter what, even if… even if he never saw Harry in person ever again, he could always visit him in his mind and he could say everything he wanted to and everything would be fine.

Draco stepped back and clasped Harry's hand momentarily before letting go and letting his hand swing by his side. Harry smiled and Draco smiled back, memorizing the way Harry's face lit up.

"See you later," Harry said with a love-struck grin, before turning and heading away, to his destiny, to what he'd been waiting for his entire life. Draco had never seen anyone so sure, so willing, in his entire life.

He would remember it always.

A/N: Feedback please! Lyrics: Yesterday by The Beatles


	12. Your Eyes Are Beautiful

And so it isJust like you said it would beLife goes easy on meMost of the timeAnd so it isThe shorter storyNo love, no gloryNo hero in her skyI can't take my eyes off of youI can't take my eyes off you

Did I say that I loathe you?Did I say that I want toLeave it all behind?

Harry closed his eyes and wheezed out a breath.

"You okay, kid?" Harry opened his eyes as he felt Mad-Eye Moody clap his back. Harry nodded, as all of the Aurors stared at him nervously. With a resigned, but determined face, Harry began to walk forwards, everyone following him with their eyes as he went by.

It was dark; the sun had yet to rise. They were in an abandoned area, empty except for the old rickety house that leaned sideways in front of them. The house was forbidding, it seemed to be blacker than anything in the entire area, blacker than the sky.

It seemed to fit in an ironic way with what was going on in the house.

Harry hated irony.

It reminded him of Draco.

Without a glance at the others, Harry took a step forwards. He made his way to the front door and everyone stared after him, moving nothing but their eyes and heads. They seemed captured by him, by this. They wanted this. Harry wanted this. But they didn't have to do it, Harry did. They didn't know how hard it was.

Harry reached the door and tentatively placed his hand on the doorknob, trying to imagine how a house could be this important. He turned the knob and the door opened with a long shrill creak. It resounded to his core. He was missing someone terribly at this moment.

Draco closed his eyes as he felt the tug that told him they were in the house. He swallowed and tried to tell himself he was ready, that he could handle this. He turned to his homework and tried to busy himself within its simple confines. Simple. He liked that. He liked simple things. Simple things had a way of being unbelievably beautiful.

Absentmindedly, he flicked his wand in a dizzying circle, trying to perfect wand motions. He wasn't going to the house, he didn't want to see. He wasn't expected to go yet and it was fine with him.

He tried to bury himself in the simplicity of homework, the simplicity that is the fact that he goes to school and then does what his teachers tell him, but for some odd reason he kept thinking about something that didn't have anything to do with homework and was hardly simple at all.

Harry wasn't simple.

Draco hated things that weren't simple.

Draco wasn't simple either.

Things weren't going through Harry's mind. Harry wasn't thinking. Harry was moving; Harry was doing things. Harry was searching the house. He wanted to find… did he want to find… anything? Did he want to search the house and realize that it was empty and it all had been a false alarm or… did he want to find something? Maybe if he didn't search that hard he wouldn't find what he was looking for, even if it was there. Maybe if he ignored it, it would go away.

The thought was ridiculous and Harry almost immediately knew it. If he didn't find it then someone else would and they'd probably die. Besides… Draco…. He wanted to protect Draco and… this seemed… it seemed like the best way to do it.

He stopped at the foot of some stairs and looked down at the dizzying core of the house. Did he really want to go down there? It looked dark, damp, and downright frightening. If he was Voldemort, that's where he'd be. He hesitated. Did he? Did he want to go down there? A picture flashed before his eyes. A picture of something precious, something worth saving. Something he loved.

Harry placed his foot on the first step.

Draco squeezed his eyes shut. His mind was stuck, he was stuck. The only thing that was in his mind was dark and black. His hands were white and clamped onto the desk in front of him. He squeezed harder.

This wasn't right. It wasn't right. It wasn't right… but, what could he do about it… nothing, he couldn't do anything. It wasn't his fault there was bad in the world.

It wasn't his fault.

Harry wasn't aware of the fact that he was tense, that he was preparing himself for something terrible, until he reached the bottom of those stairs. He looked around at the dank room.

It was time to go and Draco knew it.

It was dark and there were cobwebs littering the floor and walls. Harry looked at the chains and the barred corner with unease. He didn't want to think about people being locked up in this place, it was just too horrible, not in a place like this.

"Drop your wand." An unsteady, wanded hand shook in front of Harry.

Draco summoned up all of his self control at that moment, and was quite glad when the shaking ceased and his face became stone. Harry's face was just a pale example of shock. He hadn't expected this. Draco knew he wouldn't expect this. Harry was just too… naïve. Too trusting. He didn't expect people to betray him. Not people he loved, anyways.

That was just Harry.

Harry, who couldn't look away from Draco's eyes.

"I said," Draco drawled. "Drop your wand."

"Draco…" Harry mouthed, disbelieving.

"I said drop it!" Draco screamed. He wasn't worried that anyone would hear. There was a silencing and locking charm on the door Harry had come through. Draco had made sure of it the moment Harry had started to walk down the stairs.

The wand fell with a clatter that reverberated through the quiet of the room, and the quiet of Draco's soul. Harry's eyes were wide and unwavering.

Draco pointed at the open cell. Harry didn't move, didn't make any sign that he had really noticed any movement at all. He seemed lost in a far away world; a world that had existed until a few minutes before, when Draco had shattered it completely.

With a sound of disgust, Draco grabbed Harry's arm and shoved him into the cell. Harry fell awkwardly and, from what Draco could tell, painfully. Draco locked the cell without looking at him. Draco briefly wished that he was naïve enough to believe that someone you loved wasn't capable of this. Of course, it was a wish, and wishes never come true.

Draco had just turned, intent on walking to the other side of the room before leaving, when Harry spoke.

"I still love you," he whispered. Draco closed his eyes and swallowed painfully before continuing to walk away. He stopped when he reached the blackened wall and placed a hand on it. He realized for the first time that it was black from some sort of burn on the face of the wall. The surface was rough and dirty, wet and… familiar?

Draco heard a scream from the other side of the room in an unconscious way; Draco was much more concerned with the swirling and buzzing that was going on in his head. He closed his eyes against it, trying to block it all out, hoping it was some sort of sickness that would pass. And pass it did.

Draco opened his eyes. He was still staring at the wall. Everything seemed normal. Then Draco heard that voice. It was high and horrible, the thing of nightmares. A voice Draco knew all too well.

"Draco…" It wheezed. He felt a tremor pass through him that was more than fear; it was like an all encompassing terror, something he couldn't even begin to describe. "You disappoint me. I had such high hopes for you… oh, well."

Draco opened his mouth to speak, to ask what the Dark Lord was talking about, to tell him that he had done everything he had been told, to say something because he was scared of what would happen if he didn't, but someone beat him to it.

That someone was himself.

"I-" His, or what sounded horribly like his, voice trembled. "I can't say I'm all that sorry," Draco squeezed his eyes shut and slowly turned around. There was a high laugh that sent chills through him. He breathed in and out for a moment. Slowly, Draco opened his eyes.

There was Harry, against the wall, his wand was not in his hand; instead, his cold eyes seemed his weapon as he glared at the Dark Lord. And he… Draco saw himself in front of Harry, wand raised. He was… he was holding his wand against Voldemort. That wasn't… why would he do that…

He heard a noise and looked over, at the cell, and saw, to his amazement, that the… other Harry was there as well. He was leaning against the bars, a look of complete amazement and disbelief upon his face.

Voldemort was smiling and he raised his wand, prepared to strike. But "Draco", and Draco could not believe his supposed self would do this, was much quicker, and without any hesitation, the room erupted with a shouted curse and green light.

Draco's eyes widened as the curse came within a hair's breadth from Voldemort and then… he wasn't sure what happened exactly. A purple light came from Voldemort's wand and seemed almost to shield him; it soaked up the power of the Avada Kedavra curse and turned into a swirling ball of green and purple light; then all was still for a moment. It seemed as if all time was suspended. And then, with a gigantic bang, the glowing orb exploded. Draco was shocked as he and Harry were thrown violently against the wall with a thud that was noiseless against the deafening roar of the blast.

And then suddenly, it was all over. He and Harry lay motionless on the floor, their bodies inter-tangled, and Voldemort… Voldemort was gone.

The swirling returned and Draco felt the nausea wash over him before, as quickly as it came, it left. He opened his eyes and saw Harry's green one's staring back at him with a shocked roundness. Everything was exactly as it had been before, except for where Draco was standing, that had changed.

"What was that…?" Harry said breathily.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," Draco said tonelessly, shoving his wand in his pocket as Harry's eyes widened and he mouthed words that didn't come out.

Draco heard a chuckle and felt his skin crawl.

"Why, hello there, Draco, Harry." Voldemort nodded at each of them in turn.

Draco fell to his knees. "My lord," He said. Voldemort smiled.

"It is good to see you know your side, Draco."

Draco flinched. "What ever would give you the idea that I was anything but faithful, my lord?"

Another laugh. "It seems that these circumstances have become much better than I had hoped.

"I can assure you, my lord, I am nothing but faithful to you," Draco's eyes were downcast and he kept them that way. He tried to think only about the dark, mouldy floor. He just tried to focus on that, to block out everything else, yet he couldn't help but hear the conversation going on.

"Harry," Voldemort said warmly. "It has been far too long."

If Harry was scared, he hid it well, as his voice did not tremble as he spoke, instead, it was filled with an angry loathing. "I see you're doing what you've always been good at: ruining people's lives." Voldemort laughed loudly.

"You are a mouthy little brat, aren't you?" Voldemort stopped and his voice turned icy and cold. "I can change that."

The floor, the floor, the floor, the floor, the floor, the…

"You're defenceless, Harry." Voldemort's voice was slippery, like a snake's. Draco couldn't look, couldn't look, but couldn't help but look. He wanted a… he wanted to see Harry one last time.

Harry's eyes were dark and intense, hatred sparkling beneath their depths. Draco felt his eyes begin to prickle with something wet, though he tried to ignore the reason behind it.

"You're despicable," Harry spat. Voldemort barked out a sharp laugh.

"Well, it doesn't really matter what you think, now does it, seeing as you'll soon be dead, just like your parents."

Harry flinched. That hit a nerve.

"Don't you dare talk about my parents," Harry said darkly, menacingly. He may be behind bars but that didn't mean he had to die like he was imprisoned. Harry's eyes flickered briefly and he saw Draco, his eyes tortured and wet. Harry wished he could kill Voldemort for him.

Voldemort didn't miss it. He grinned maliciously. "Does Harry have a crush on a certain someone?" He said, licking his lips. "Aw, well that's just too sweet." He stopped suddenly as if he'd had a sudden inspiration. "You know, Harry, I'm not as bad as everyone makes me out to be." He smiled evilly. "I think, since I'm nice guy, I could kill you both together!" He laughed horribly. "Wouldn't that be something?! A present day romeo-juliet romance that would be." He laughed even harder as he saw the horror flash behind Harry's eyes. "Oh, this is just too good! He betrays you to your enemy and you still love him; you still don't want him to die." Voldemort's lip curled. "It sickens me."

Draco felt his hair being ripped back, and, with a deafening cry, he was hurled backwards. Voldemort opened the door of the cell as Harry scrambled back. And, Draco was thrown to the floor.

The cell door swung shut. Draco's eyes were closed and he felt arms pull him and soon he was resting against something soothing, warm and soft. He opened his eyes and looked into Harry's kind face. Harry's face… was always… so kind; even when he was mad. Draco was never scared of Harry, not Harry himself, anyways. He was scared of loving Harry, scared of Harry leaving him, scared of people who loved Harry. But never of Harry himself.

Because Harry's face was so kind.

Draco felt a slightly calloused hand stroke his face and he smiled, his head against Harry's chest. He could feel that there was dirt on his face but, somehow, that only made this all the more real, and for that Draco was grateful. He needed something to help him believe, he wasn't strong enough alone.

He needed Harry.

Harry felt Draco's smile all the way to his core and he was so very, very happy that Draco was able to be there with him, knowing he was selfish for wanting it, for not wanting Draco to be far, far away like he should, and wanting to be selfish at the same time.

"Harry…" Draco sighed. Harry smiled warmly, and it seemed as if everything fell away. They were in a field, and they were looking up at the sky. Harry was holding Draco simply because he could.

Harry smiled, a small tear filling in his eye, because Draco looked so stunningly beautiful with that streak of dirt on his cheek. "Yes?"

"This is what I wished for; for us to die together."

Harry laughed. "I know, you told me, remember?"

Draco shook his head. "No, Harry, the star. This is what I wished on the star."

Then Draco threw his head back and screamed. It felt like molten metal had been poured into his system and everything, every single thing, burned.

Harry's eyes widened with shock as Draco's screams echoed through his head. The world had suddenly come back into focus. There were no more fields.

"Stop it!" Harry cried, his eyes still glued on Draco, who was shaking uncontrollably. "Stop!" He screamed at Voldemort, who was casting spells.

And it did stop, and Voldemort was smiling as Draco was weakly lying against Harry. And Harry was sobbing, hating himself for getting Draco involved in this, hating himself for letting Voldemort know how he felt. Hating himself for not being strong enough to get them out.

And Draco opened his eyes and looked into Harry's crying one's and he smiled, because this was a lot better way to die than he had thought it was going to be. He didn't think he had a very long life span ahead of him anyways.

It suddenly dawned upon Draco why he had helped Harry in that vision.

Voldemort prepared himself, bringing his wand up and preparing to kill them. Draco and Harry didn't pay it much attention, as they looked into each other's eyes and time slowed.

Draco couldn't believe it, but, he was sure, then, that he believed.

Draco smiled and so did Harry, the twinkle in his eyes once again, Draco shining wondrously and Harry's face so, so kind. And then all too fast Draco was trying to drape himself over Harry, trying to shield from Voldemort as much as possible, hoping that he might save Harry, possibly give him a chance, and Harry was digging his hand into Draco's pocket, at the same time trying to pull him closer, wanting to be as close as he could to Draco.

Needless to say, if they both died then, they would have a great picture to remember the other by, and that was all that mattered at that moment. Not what would happen, but what had happened.

A/N: The Blower's Daughter by Damien Rice, that's the lyrics. I promise there's some lightness coming… soon…


	13. Give

It was a very fast thing. Harry pulled the wand out of Draco's pocket, and, a split second before Voldemort, he cast the killing curse. Voldemort was defeated.

At this time the Aurors managed to break through Draco's locking spell, and they came down the stairs, led by Dumbledore and Snape. Harry had fainted from the energy he used to cast the Avada Kedavra curse, and Draco had passed out from exhaustion and shock. Both boys were unconscious as they hauled them out of the room.

In case you wanted to know, Voldemort's body was still there.

The sun was rising as they all stepped out of the house, and it bathed everything in an orange glow. An Auror came out carrying Draco, and Snape, carrying Harry. The atmosphere had changed greatly from when they had first entered the house.

Snape and Dumbledore rushed the boys to the school where they were revived by Madam Pomfrey, amazing witch that she is, and were greeted by weeping friends (yes, even Ron was crying, though he hid it well).

Draco's mother was there, and she and her son had a very, very warm meeting, filled with hugs and kisses, I assure you. Draco, much to his shock, also received a very loving hug from Hermione, and a wonderful smile from Pansy, and, amazingly, when Draco offered his hand to Ron, Ron grabbed him and pulled him into a bone-breaking bear hug.

Harry watched the whole thing with wet eyes. In fact, I believe that everyone in that hospital wing had wet eyes… even Snape was crying (Dumbledore: Severus, are you crying? Snape: No! For god's sakes stop trying to get me involved in these things! Dumbledore: Come now, Severus, there's no reason to be ashamed. Snape: There's nothing to be ashamed about! I am not crying!)

They all spent a day full of happy talking and games, none of them really broaching the subject of what had happened. It was much too confusing and new.

And then, when, after a very long time, everyone had left to go to bed, Draco crawled into bed with Harry, and they fell asleep, whispering murmured words of love, and holding hands.

It was a wonderful day. It was a wonderful night.

What had seemed like such a disaster at first turned into one of the best times of their lives.

Unbeknownst to either of the boys, when they were both asleep, Draco's mother snuck into the room and kissed them both goodnight. Both of them.

It's a beautiful thing, love. People always talk about how much you lose through it, but really, you never really lose anything good, do you? You lose the bad, horrible things, and, you gain, oh, so much more. I think the gaining is the best part, even better than the losing, because, unlike the losing, it can be so subtle, so unpronounced, that you miss it, you miss it until one day, long after, you realize just how much you have now. I find it amazing.

A/N: Very, very short chapter. grin But good, nonetheless, eh? I wonder if anyone got my subtle hints at the end… please tell me if you did.


	14. ObviousObliviousLove

'Twas more than I could take, pity for pity's sakeSome nights kept me awake, I thought that I was strongerWhen you gonna realise, that you don't even have to try any longer?Do what you want to.Girl, put your records on, tell me your favourite songYou go ahead, let your hair downSapphire and faded jeans, I hope you get your dreams,Just go ahead, let your hair down.

Oh, you're gonna find yourself somewhere, somehow

Draco eyed the floor apprehensively. It would be awhile before he was comfortable in Dumbledore's office, it just seemed too strange. Harry, however, was right at home, and seemed quite happy, with Fawkes nuzzling his hand.

Dumbledore smiled. "I'm sure there is much you wish to know." Draco raised his eyebrows. It was a slight understatement. Dumbledore, being who he was, missed none of this, and his smile broadened warmly. "The thing you both saw," and here Harry glanced at Draco, who was looking quite pointedly at the floor, still uneasy with his new role and the fact that he _had _told Harry he hadn't seen anything. "Was a memory."

"How did you know we saw something?" Harry asked suddenly.

An emotion neither of them could identify flickered across Dumbledore's face. "There is… much that we know."

"We?" Draco asked.

"Me, Professor Snape," he looked at Harry. "Your friends."

Harry nodded, assuming Dumbledore would have an explanation for it all. Draco didn't feel quite the same way, and was still very, very apprehensive.

"A little while ago, Draco came forward and told us some very valuable information on Voldemort." Draco knotted his eyebrows together as Harry shot him a confused look.

"No I didn't," Draco said, confused.

Dumbledore nodded sadly. "Yes, Draco, yes you did." Dumbledore took a deep breath before continuing his story. "You told us where Voldemort was and how he had expected you to make sure Harry was in a certain place a t a certain time." Draco and Harry shared a feeling of complete and utter shock. "The reason you gave for telling us," Dumbledore looked at each of them in turn. "Was that you and Harry had become, shall we say, more than friends." Draco felt his cheeks grow hot.

"This was, as you can imagine, a bit of a shock, but, in light of the information you gave us, and you gave us quite a bit," he said looking at Draco. "We decided it was safe to trust you. After all, if Harry loved you, then we all decided we could love you."

Draco's eyes were once again pinned on the floor. He was confused and tired and this was making him feel nauseous.

"The plan was that Harry would go to this place, but he'd be prepared, and when Voldemort arrived, the Aurors would try and help, and essentially Harry would kill Voldemort."

Dumbledore's face became grave as he continued. "However, when the spell that should have killed him was sent, Voldemort cast a spell of his own, one that we did not foresee. It is called the Memerasanda curse. It wipes the last while of memories from the people who are hit with it. The person who casts the spell can overcome anything, even the killing curse, and live, until the people who were hit with the curse manage to get some part of their memory back. Then, when that happens, the caster will appear at their side."

There was a silence in the room.

"I thought you said nothing could overcome the killing curse?" Harry asked uncertainly.

"This is a new spell," Dumbledore said. "And does not, necessarily, defeat the curse, it merely postpones it, you could say. In a way, it's almost as bad as the killing curse because there is a good chance that the recipient of the curse's memory won't come back."

Harry nodded absently while Draco's eyes continued to focus anywhere but the other two occupants of the room.

"How much," Draco cursed himself as his voice cracked and wavered. "Of our memory is gone?"

Dumbledore looked very, very sorry indeed. "A month's. Maybe more, maybe less. It's hard to tell exactly."

Draco closed his eyes as Harry placed his head in his hands.

"Can we get it back?" Draco asked, his voice heartbreakingly hopeful.

Dumbledore shook his head. "It is unlikely."

"But there's a chance, right? There's a chance." Draco's voice was high and he knew it was useless but he didn't want to miss that, he didn't want to miss all those times with Harry, all those first times…

Dumbledore just looked sad. "We tried everything to bring back your memory. We let you play out the last few days of your lives and only that one memory came back. The fact that the one memory did come back was amazing. I don't think you'll get any other memories."

Draco nodded lifelessly. Harry's face was still in his hands.

Dumbledore looked troubled. "I am so very sorry." He said.

Draco stood up and slowly walked to the gargoyle. He left the room, not wanting to spend another minute in there. He stepped out into the hallway and began to walk very fast.

"Draco!" He heard Harry call him, knew Harry was calling him, and instead of turning back or stopping, he sped up, not wanting to talk or see him. "Draco!" Harry yelled, a little louder this time. It was almost a scream.

Draco continued moving faster, he was almost running. But Harry was apparently a very fast runner and he gripped Draco's arm and pulled him to a stop. Draco threw his hand off and continued walking away.

Harry grabbed his shoulders and yanked Draco around so he was facing him.

"What do you want?" Draco spat.

"I just want to talk, Draco, its not-"

"No, it's not!" Draco yelled, his breathing ragged. "It's not okay and it's not going to be okay!" He stopped and squeezed his eyes shut, telling himself not to cry, not now, not in front of Harry.

"Draco…" Harry reached his hand out to touch Draco's face. Draco threw him off.

"Leave me alone!" Draco screamed. Harry looked like he'd been slapped and he stared, dumbstruck, at Draco. "How can you stand there like everything's alright!" Draco's voice pitched. "Do you know how much we're missing? What we're missing? Who knows what could have happened before that battle. Maybe you cheated on me!" Harry's eyes looked even more pained. Draco laughed dryly. "Fuck, maybe I cheated on you." Draco's eyes seemed unfocused all of a sudden. "I don't like not knowing, Harry. I've spent so much time not knowing and I'm fucking sick and tired of it. I can't take this, I really can't."

Draco stopped for a moment and seemed to gather himself. "I mean, I can handle the whole dying part, I can handle people trying to kill us, 'cause then I know it's for sure, how each of us feels and what's happened but this," he looked at the floor, unable to meet Harry's hurt eyes. "I can't handle not knowing if maybe we're confusing our feelings for something else. I'm afraid that we were really, really, good friends and now that we just suddenly had those feelings it's confused us completely."

Draco looked up, knowing he had to make eye contact otherwise Harry wouldn't believe him. "It's too fucked up. We're missing too much. I don't think I can make that work, Harry. I don't think I can go on every day knowing that there's a very big, very important chunk of our lives missing. I mean," Draco's voice cracked and hitched. "Did we have sex? That just seems like it would be important to know the first time you ever had sex, don't you think?" Draco put his face in his hands, much like Harry had. "Harry, I… I don't think this is going to work." Draco lifted up his head.

This was too much. This had been too hard for both of them. All of this drama, all of it. Draco felt so very, very tired. He had been so sure both he and Harry were dead, and now, this. He didn't know what to think and neither did Harry. Draco wasn't sure he could handle this now. He was just taking out all this pressure the only way he knew how.

"You're breaking up with me?" Harry said softly. Draco nodded. Harry laughed humourlessly. "I guess for once it really wasn't me." He shook his head. "It seems strange to be getting dumped over something I had no power over. It's funny."

"Life's a strange and funny thing." Draco said. "It's also fucking ironic and depressing. Try not to pay too much attention to it, it does things to you." Draco turned and started to walk away.

Harry's eyes became dull and empty. He stared after Draco for a long moment before dropping his eyes to the floor. "I guess every star really does die." Harry whispered.

Draco sat, his head leaning against a tree. He hated life. He fucking hated it. It was mean and rude and everything just fucking sucked. And that's exactly how he felt.

He could remember, a day before this, when he had been shocked about the lesson plan during a transfiguration class, thinking that there was a mistake, for he was sure that they were supposed to be having an exam. He also remembered someone telling him they'd done the exam ages ago. He had laughed and thought nothing of it. It seemed very important now. How had he done on that test? Had he studied? Had all the hard work he'd put in paid off or had he forgotten everything half way into the exam?

He wanted to know. He wanted to know because he hated the fact that it was possible that he'd missed something very important. There had been a lot of bad in his life; he didn't want to miss a second of the good things, not when he would need them on those dark and stormy nights.

Harry may not care, but he cared. He cared a lot. He cared whether or not he had good memories of them together. He cared whether or not all he could remember at the end of his life was that he had been bitter and alone. He cared. And yet there was no way he was going to get those memories back.

Harry had friends; Harry didn't know how precious those memories really were.

Draco hit his head against the tree, trying somehow to think of what it was he was supposed to do now. He wasn't with Harry; he wasn't with Voldemort's followers and… Voldemort was dead. Of that he was sure. Now what did he do?

Draco sighed. Well, what did he want to do with his life? He wanted to be happy, that was obvious. What made him happy? Well, he supposed, a few things. Draco liked it when people surprised him with presents, he liked little kids (though he'd never admit that to anyone), he liked staring up at the stars, he liked riding on his broomstick… Draco seethed. Well, that wasn't helping. He couldn't spend the rest of his life riding on his broomstick and staring at the stars, could he? Well… could he?

Draco thought about it. He was rich; he didn't think money would be a problem. He could spend the rest of his days at Malfoy manor with his mother; there was no doubt about it that he would love that.

Except… and he didn't like to think about this, but, what would happen when his mother died? She wasn't going to live forever, and, when she did die, he'd be alone. He supposed, perhaps Pansy, but no. Pansy was with Hermione and Hermione was with Harry, and Harry brought back too many bad memories. Draco laughed out loud. Well, maybe not so many memories…

Draco sighed again. He really was getting nowhere. Back to the drawing board. What made him happy… Draco groaned and secretly wished he could just kill himself then and there. There was no getting around it, was there? What made him happy? Honestly! The answer to that was obvious! HARRY!!! HARRY MADE HIM HAPPY!!!! Draco muttered to himself about insufferable Gryffindors. Of course _Harry_ made him happy, that part was obvious; Draco had figured that out the moment he had started walking away from him after their supposed "breakup".

Yes, as he was walking away he was thinking about Harry's face when he told him it was over and he was thinking about down in the basement of that house with Voldemort. Draco sighed. Harry made him believe. Bloody bastard, making Draco feel and all that…

Break-up, seriously? How do you break up with someone you're willing to die for? But, that didn't mean Draco had to go running back to Harry, now did it? No! He could sit here and wait for Harry to come and beg Draco to take him back. Yes, yes he could. Draco drummed his fingers on the ground. Yeah, he could do that…

Draco hated life! He hated it, but not as much as he hated Harry fucking Potter. There was no way he was going to go running back to him. No – way – in - hell… fuck it! Draco threw off his robes knowing they'd only weigh him down.

"Harry!" He screamed, running like a complete and total madman. "HARRY!!!" As Draco came to the top of a hill he saw a very, very confused Harry look over his back at him. Harry mouthed a silent question, but even if he had said anything no one would have been able to hear it over Draco's screams.

"Harry!" Draco was almost there, almost near that insufferable _idiot_. "Har-" Draco's screech was caught off as he jumped onto Harry, curling his legs around him and slammed his lips against Harry's, kissing him right and good. Harry stumbled and fell, rolling in the grass, yet still managing to kiss Draco. Draco hoped the fall _really _hurt.

"But - I thought we - were broken up?" Harry managed to say between kisses.

Draco rolled on top of Harry and straddled him amid the cheers and cries of what seemed to be the entirety of the student body. What, did everyone decide to go for a walk today? (What Draco didn't know was that it wasn't just students… there were a few teachers there and, let's just say, Hagrid was crying.) Draco grinned despite himself. "I decided we could make new memories." Harry laughed and pulled Draco in for another kiss, tumbling about in the grass again.

"Come on, Severus." Dumbledore grinned. "Admit it: you wanted it to happen all along."

Severus looked at the headmaster stiffly. "I in no way support this type of philandering. In fact, I find it downright disgusting. The fact that Slytherins and Gryffindors are… well…whatever, is atrocious and a complete and utter insult to the norms of this school." Snape looked at the headmaster. "It seems to be a bit of a pandemic, to tell the truth."

Dumbledore raised his eyebrows. "Indeed, Severus? Do explain."

"It appears that not only are Potter and Malfoy together, but Parkinson and Granger are dating _and,_" he particularly stressed the "and" part. "Zabini and Weasley are seeing each other."

"Blaise and Ron are seeing each other? My goodness this is good news!" Snape looked slightly ill at this. "I thought they'd never get together."

Snape narrowed his eyes. "I know you are all for inter-house-relationships, but there is just a certain thing between Slytherins and Gryfindors."

"I see." Dumbledore said. "So you do not endorse it at all?"

"Not one bit."

"I hear you and Minerva are going out tonight."

There was a stiff silence.

"And…"

Dumbledore smiled. "Nothing, I was merely stating a fact." Snape smiled and eventually laughed along with Dumbledore.

"These are the best times of our lives, Severus." Dumbledore said happily. "All the true evils are put to rest and the good is out and ready to rebuild."

"What about all the loss though, some things you can't overcome."

Dumbledore smiled. "When there's love involved, you never really lose anything that you need to keep; in fact, sometimes what you lose is downright horrible." Snape smiled hesitantly, he wasn't all that good at it yet, he was still learning. "There's always room to heal."

Snape nodded and looked out the window to where Malfoy and Potter were still at it. He could see people holding hands, smiles on their faces. "So, Dumbledore," Snape smiled mischievously. "You know how you're going on about love and all?"

"Yes, Severus…"

"Well…"

"Well what?"

"Come on, when are you gonna' get some, you know?"

Dumbledore laughed. "Do you really want to know the answer to that question?"

Jumbles of thoughts passed behind Snape's eyes. He looked away. "No, I suppose not."

" Sometimes it's better not to know anyways."

There was a long silence as they stared at the scene below them. Finally, Snape broke the silence. "Do you think they'll make it? Harry and Draco, I mean."

Dumbledore smiled. "I'm not sure. But, sometimes it's-"

"Yes, yes, sometimes it's better not to know anyways."

---------------------

There's really no such thing as an end, merely more beginnings, all rolled up into a very long story.

--------------

A/N: Oh, don't you just love happy endings? But this isn't over! Well, basically it is, we just have some little things to tie up. grin I hope you like it! I loved writing this, it may have even been better than the first chapter. It was like, finally (and there have been some pretty unhopeful chapters lately) everything's coming together. sigh I can't believe this is really almost over… it seems so hard to let it go…


	15. A Prologue At The End

**A Month or so ago…**

"Harry! Ah!" Draco screamed as he fell into the bed. Belting out laughter, Harry grinned and tried to pull himself and Draco farther up onto the bed. "No, Harry!" Draco giggled. Harry put his finger to his lips and shushed him, trying to get at Draco's belt at the same time.

Draco giggled and tried to free himself from Harry, who happened to be lying on top of him. "Harry! We can't, it's the…" He let out a bark of laughter as Harry's hand dipped into his pants. "It's the hospital wing… Harry!" Draco let out a yelp of shock, as he felt Harry's hand close around his cock.

Draco groaned and Harry smiled, capturing his lips. "I really don't think we should…" Draco stopped as Harry thrust against him. "Oh…" Draco threw his head back. Harry moved away, suddenly.

Draco made a squeaky sound of protest.

"Draco." Harry said.

"Oh… What, Harry?"

"I think we should have sex."

Draco's head shot up. "What?"

Harry bit his lip. "Fuck. Umm… I.. er… FUCK!" Harry hit himself on the forehead with his hand. Draco found it hard not to laugh, but, he charitably restrained it. Harry was so cute…

Harry groaned from behind his hands. "Draco, would you mind if I made love to you?"

Draco's mind went blank and he couldn't think of a goddamn thing to say. His mouth was somewhat dry as he fought with himself to say it. To just SAY IT.

Draco watched as Harry's hands retreated closer to his face, and it was then that he realized Harry was probably just as nervous as him.

He laughed and Harry peeked from behind his hands, horrified that he'd done something wrong.

"You're laughing!"

"I'm sorry." Draco said, wiping the smile from his face. "It's just you're-"

"You're laughing!"

Draco laughed again, he couldn't help himself.

"Stop laughing!"

Draco managed to control himself. "It's just, Harry, you're so sweet."

Harry looked incredulous as his mouth dropped. "I am not sweet! I am dark and dangerous! I am smoldering!" Draco's hand flew to his mouth as he tried to hold back laughter. Harry was so wonderful when he was like this, it was positively delightful.

Draco took a deep breath and lowered his hand. "Of course you are, sweetheart. –Harry looked slightly miffed at that, even though Draco always said it- In fact," Draco smirked. "Sweet guys get me hard."

Harry's eyebrow's shot up. "Really?"

Draco nodded.

Harry grinned. "Well, in that case, would you mind it if I held your hand?" Draco laughed as Harry lowered himself onto Draco again.

Harry landed, his head inches away from Draco's, and he smiled, a heart-breakingly honest smile.

"Harry…" Draco breathed.

"Yes?" Harry said clearly, brushing his hand against Draco's face. Draco didn't know how Harry was so confident, didn't really understand it and wanted to be that way himself. Instead of this insecure mess that he was now.

He wanted to be sure.

Draco began to sob, suddenly the hardships gained a grasp on him and they were real once again, real even though moments before he'd been able to block them out. Draco hated the fact that he broke down, that he had to pretend to be happy so he wouldn't break down. Harry wiped a tear from Draco's cheek.

"I'm s-scared," Draco sobbed. Harry frowned, cupping Draco's face in his hands and running his thumbs over the smooth skin. Harry looked at him for a long moment, his resolve never seeming to waver.

Suddenly, though, he spoke, and his voice did more than quiver. "I'm scared, too," Harry's face screwed in on itself and Draco let out a sob, sitting up and wrapping his arms around Harry and holding onto him desperately. Harry held on just as tightly, squeezing the air out of Draco and leaving him breathless.

"Please don't leave me…" Draco half whispered, half sobbed.

Harry nodded violently. "I won't, I won't, I won't…"

Draco took in a very big, quivering breath through his noise. "You promise?" He asked frantically.

Harry nodded again. "I promise."

"If you die…" Draco's voice raised and left off on an unsaid note.

Harry pulled away and looked into Draco's eyes. "If I die, I'm dying with you," Draco smiled and laughed breathlessly, before pulling Harry in for a kiss, wrapping his arms around Harry's neck.

Harry kissed back, breathlessly, desperately, franticly, everything and anything and wanting to hold onto Draco while he could because he was scared it was going to be over so very soon.

Too soon.

With Draco, any end was too soon.

Draco sighed softly and pulled away, his hands coming to rest by Harry's face.

"Harry," he said breathlessly.

"Yes?"

"You can do that thing to me now."

"What thing?"

"Make love to me," Harry stared down at Draco's lips, which were wet and parted. He nodded profusely.

"Okay," he said, nervously, and leaned forwards, pressing his lips to Draco's. Draco whimpered, though Harry wasn't sure if it was because of the kiss or because of their impending doom.

Harry found he didn't really care though.

Pushing Draco back down onto the bed, Harry bit alternately at Draco's neck, pleased with the little marks left on his skin. Harry grinned as he remembered all the times he'd been in this room with injuries. It seemed strange that this would be the place they'd have their first time.

Or, maybe it was fitting. Romantic even.

Draco closed his eyes. This was where people healed, where they got better. Draco desperately wanted to get better, and so did Harry. They both wanted to get over their past, their scars.

Maybe this was the best place to do it.

Draco let out a moan as Harry began to strip off his shirt, casting it to the side and placing a hand on Draco's chest, smoothing it over his soft skin. Harry smiled at the quick rise and fall of Draco's chest.

Leaning down, his eyes on Draco's and Draco's on his, Harry kissed Draco's chest. He opened his mouth and timidly inched his tongue out, pushing it slowly against Draco. Closing his eyes, Harry felt a sudden salty caress on his tongue, revelling in it and smiling as Draco began to fidget restlessly.

Harry swallowed uncomfortably, feeling something in the bottom of his stomach churn, or spasm, or just burn. Opening his eyes and taking in a deep breath, Harry fumbled clumsily with the button on Draco's trousers. He cursed himself, hoping that Draco wasn't going out of his mind with impatience; and, upon looking up, Harry saw that Draco was going insane, yet Harry was sure it wasn't from impatience.

Draco felt the give as his trousers came down, and the rough pull as they were dragged down. He groaned weakly as he heard the pants come to a slide and stop on the floor. Opening his eyes, Draco groaned yet again, as Harry was just at the point of pulling his shirt over his head. Draco's eyes glazed over slightly as he watched Harry pull off his pants as well.

And then Harry reached for his boxer shorts and suddenly Draco's eyes weren't so glazed over, Curiosity and anticipation mixing and becoming one. Gulping loudly, Draco watched as Harry slowly slid the damp material off.

Harry's prick was something of dreams, and Draco couldn't decide between sighing or sitting up and grabbing it. It was just… beautiful, he supposed. Though it seemed strange to be describing something like that as beautiful. Its head was red and wet and Draco found himself wanting to touch it very badly. And Malfoy's always do what they want, so…

Draco tentatively stretched out his fingers, barely brushing against the tip and Harry closed his eyes and groaned, flexing instinctively and grinding into Draco's legs. Draco slid his finger through the pre-come and brought it up to his lips. Harry's eyes were now open and slid so close to being closed that Draco wasn't sure if Harry could see him anymore, as Draco parted his lips slightly and slowly slipped the finger in, licking at the tip.

Harry pulled at Draco's boxers quite suddenly, and Draco let out a yelp as his body was thrown about quite harshly, and Harry pulled the boxers off and threw them away, glad to be rid of the meddlesome things.

Draco felt his cheeks go red as Harry stared down at him, or, rather, a certain part of him.

"Umm… Harry?" Draco asked uncertainly after a long silence.

"Yes?" Harry said, not looking up.

"Is there… umm…" Draco's head sunk against the pillows and his voice trailed off as he felt Harry's hand trace a slow trail over his prick. "G-god…" Draco shut his eyes flexed his hips upwards slightly.

Harry stopped all of a sudden and Draco groaned. Casting a lubrication charm (Harry had looked into this before hand), Harry took a deep breath and, lifting Draco up slightly, he placed a finger inside of him. They both shared a simultaneous groan as Draco felt the stretch and Harry felt the enclosing heat sucking him in.

Pulling out and placing another finger in, Harry glanced up briefly, taking in Draco's enrapt, careless expression. Harry grinned. He liked that look on Draco. Perhaps he'd make it happen more often.

Pulling his fingers out, Harry bit his lip and looked down. Trying to take a calming breath, Harry told himself to calm down and relax; this wasn't anything to be frightened of.

Harry looked up one last time at Draco's face and… Draco was beautiful, Harry thought very suddenly, as Draco's thrown back head moved anxiously and his body quivered. Harry decided very quickly that he liked that, Draco quivering. It was kind of intoxicating.

Like Draco. Like Draco's face that was so perfectly flawed, in the way it was almost too pointy but could never actually be too anything, because this was Draco and Draco was… perfect. Draco was so fucking perfect. But Harry had taken too long in thinking this and now Draco was staring at him with a scared expression, as though he thought Harry had found something wrong with _him_. Draco could just be so wrong about things sometimes. It infuriated Harry because so much about Draco was wonderful and Draco would never accept it.

"Harry…?" He said, softly, scared, apprehensive.

Harry stared up at his face, his beautiful face, and said, without the slightest hesitation, because there was no reason to hesitate when he was so sure, "I love you."

And Draco froze, his body stopped quivering for a moment and his face looked so very shocked. Then his body started quivering again, only harsher, more pronounced this time, and Harry got the distinct impression that Draco was trying not to cry.

But Draco was trying to not to cry. Because they'd never said they'd loved each other before. It'd been assumed, unsaid between them, but having it out there, in the open, actually saying it, was something that seemed so very strange and foreign and Draco wanted to hear it a million times over and it would never be enough because he wanted so badly for Harry to love him and he loved Harry and he… he didn't want Harry to die.

And he thought, suddenly, that, maybe, Harry understood that.

No one had ever really understood Draco before.

"I… I-I love you too." Draco said, his voice faltering and then taking a great, rough swallow as his throat felt so very dry all of a sudden.

And Harry smiled, grabbing Draco's hand in his, curling his fingers amazingly in a connecting sort of way that made Draco dizzy, and thrusting, oh so of a sudden and the next thing Draco knew, there was someone inside of him.

No matter what, no matter if they're lives ended and they never saw each other again. They both knew it and felt it and maybe they didn't understand it fully yet but there was enough comprehension of it to know this one thing for ever and ever and even after the end, for second chances do come and even if they don't, some things need to last after the curtains close. Things like this.

There was someone inside of Draco. Someone thrusting, coming, making love in a beautiful way that was heart-wrenching and wonderful, in a way that only one thing can be. And Harry was inside of him, Draco. In more ways than one.

Harry would always be inside of him.

A/N: It's over! Oh my goodness, I'm not sure whether to cry or jump for glee. Please tell me what you think! I really do like this; I've had this last scene in my head since when I first started writing this fic. I knew this was how the very end was going to be. sigh Unconditional love, eh?


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